


Asking Price

by ReyloTrashCompactor (NextToSomething), SouthSideStory



Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015), Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: AU, Age Difference, Courtesan Rey, F/M, Hosnian Prime, Mistress AU, No First Order, Past Rape/Non-con, Reylo - Freeform, Senator Ben Solo, Sex Work
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-01-27
Updated: 2018-12-05
Packaged: 2019-03-10 07:12:44
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 27,596
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13497258
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NextToSomething/pseuds/ReyloTrashCompactor, https://archiveofourown.org/users/SouthSideStory/pseuds/SouthSideStory
Summary: The girl was powerful in the Force; this was what Senator Ben Solo realized first. What he noticed second was her lilac lipstick, marking her as a courtesan. His third realization was the most important: he wanted her like he’d never wanted anything in his life.Rey from Jakku quickly learned things about the Senator as well. He was on nearly every holoscreen in Hosnian Prime, he was foolish with money, and he wanted to buy her. It took her longer to figure out that he was a liar, as powerful as he was breakable, and the home she’d always wanted.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This story uses material from Bloodline by Claudia Grey, but you definitely don’t need to read it to follow everything here. (reylotrashcompactor hasn’t, actually) (But you should check it out, because it’s awesome! -SouthSideStory)

.

.

Smoke clouded the bar, making everything soft and indistinct. Just one more layer of cover in a place where no one wanted to be seen. Skellig’s was certainly not a respectable haunt for a galactic senator, and that was why Ben had no intention of being spotted.

He waited at a corner table, sipping Port in a Storm cut with pomegranate juice. The only person Ben knew to drink it straight was Chewie, but if the liquor was diluted he could handle it. Although the barkeep hadn’t asked him questions, he could see the doubt on her face when she’d set his drink in front of him. It wasn’t seemly for a senator to order alcohol that could be used as a cleaning agent, but it had been the sort of day Ben would rather forget.

Krastos finally showed up at quarter to midnight. An hour later than Ben had expected him.

“You’re late,” Ben said.

Krastos scratched at his cheek, right over one of the tattoos that Zabraks were so famous for.

“I had a long day,” he said.

Ben snorted. “Not as long as mine, I promise.”

“I heard.”

Krastos laughed and pointed to the screen in the corner, which was replaying footage from today’s vote. Skellig’s wasn’t a politically inclined establishment by any means, but this was the sort of news that would play all over the galaxy. Thanks to the Populists—thanks to his mother, really—the New Republic’s military budget was about to be cut by a third. And it seemed there wasn't a single place on Hosnian Prime where Ben could get away from the vote he lost.

“Well?” he asked. “Did you find anything on Tai-Lin Garr?”

Krastos slid a flimsi folder across the table. Hard copies were nearly unheard of on Hosnian Prime, but hiring an investigator to spy on a political opponent was the kind of thing that could get Ben banned from the Senate and prosecuted. Every precaution was necessary, and a digital trail was too dangerous.

Ben flipped through the folder. Krastos had at least been thorough. It was all here: financial reports, transcripts of personal comm conversations, pictures of Senator Garr all over the city, medcenter records and more.

It was all here, and it was frustratingly unhelpful.

“There’s nothing,” Ben said, slamming the folder closed. “The man’s clean.”

“Squeaky,” Krastos agreed. “Total waste of my time and your money—which you still owe me, by the way.”

Paying Krastos wouldn’t be a drop in the bucket of his wealth, but Ben didn’t like to be reminded of debts. Especially from a criminal whose work had been utterly useless.

So he drew upon the energy in this bar, the balance that strung together every lowlife here, and tipped it in his favor.

“You’ve decided to do the work for free,” he said, rounding his voice with calm authority. “You’ll leave this place right now, then destroy all the information you gathered on Senator Garr.”

Krastos blinked, a slack, dazed look settling over his face. “I’ve decided to do the work for free. I’ll leave this place right now, then destroy all the information I gathered on Senator Garr.”

He watched Krastos walk out, the flimsi folder hidden inside his coat once again.

A cold, satisfied hum played under Ben’s skin. It had been some time since he’d used the Force in this way, and he’d missed it. The power that exerting his will on another creature gave him, the grounding sense of control it granted him when he so often felt unmoored.

He finished his drink, shuddering; even cut with a sharp juice it still tasted like fuel. But the Port had done its job. Ben felt calmer, the tension in his muscles loosened.

That sense of liquid peace didn’t last long, because there was a sudden ripple in the Force. Like a stone being dropped in still waters, resounding and disruptive. Ben knew the feeling well, but it only crept up on him when he was around his mother, Luke, or one of his uncle’s Jedi apprentices. The presence of another person sensitive to the Force.

The girl was young, but then, most courtesans were. Even poor ones fishing for customers in the slums of Republic City. There was no mistaking her profession, not with her upper lip colored pale purple, makeup that both advertised and shamed her. She straightened as Ben approached her. Her tongue darted out to touch lightly at her lip, as if tasting to be sure her lilac lipstick was in place.

She was a pretty thing, somehow elegant and raw at once. Tall and slender with brown hair and sun-kissed skin. Her white dress showed off long, shapely legs that could be opened for a price.

It was as sad as it was absurd, that this girl—desperate and lovely, working the lowest corner of the city—was Force sensitive. But she was. He could feel it all over her.

“Can I buy you a drink?” Ben asked.

She canted her head, her lips curving slowly. “You know you don't have to do that,” she said, her voice low and breathy.

He didn't smile back.

“I know.”

The girl looked up at him, seeming very small sitting while he stood. “Yes. You pick.”

Ben got Corellian rum for both of them. Normally he’d ward off a workday headache by drinking water as well, but he’d probably catch something if he trusted the water here.

“I’m Ben,” he said. “What’s your name?”

She blinked as if caught off guard by his name. He didn’t understand that; Ben was an ordinary enough name for a man.

“Rey.” Their drinks were set down and she held up her glass in salute. “To your health, Senator.”

She was forward, he’d give her that. Probably a necessity in her line of work.

Ben raised his glass as well, returned the sentiment, and took a healthy drink of his rum. It was harsh, cheap like the liquor his father preferred.

He wasn’t sure what he wanted from this girl. The right thing to do would be to deliver her to his uncle for training, but Ben would rather eat sand than see Luke again. And after his own failure trying to follow the Jedi way, he couldn’t honestly recommend that path to anyone.

So he simply asked, “Where are you from?”

The girl offered him a beautiful, empty smile. “Nowhere.”

“Nowhere? I find that hard to believe.”

Rey smiled pleasantly. “I'm from Jakku. Care to revise?”

Ben laughed, his first in days. “ _Jakku?_ I suppose that is close enough to nowhere.”

Rey laughed with him, though the reality of it wasn't at all funny. She took another long sip of her drink, her eyes never leaving him.

When she set down her glass, she said, “I don't have to ask where you're from, of course. I might ask how you ended up _here_. And what I could do for you during your visit.”

Ben bit his lip, then made himself stop. It was one of his tells, a sign of nervousness that his first campaign manager had not quite trained him out of.

He shouldn’t even consider her unsubtle offer. Rey—if that was even her name—was no more than twenty, a desert peasant who somehow fell into sex work. Political suicide in a very pretty package.

But he could feel her presence in the Force, and it was like crowding close to a bonfire, being bathed in light, heat, shadow.

“You could get dinner with me,” he said. “Do you know anywhere around here that’s discreet and decent?”

Rey considered him for a long time. Ben was close to taking back his offer when she reached for her napkin and dipped it in the melted ice at the bottom of her cup. She wiped off her lipstick and stood.

“There's a noodle house a block and a half away. Intimate and a little scruffy, but very good food.”

.

.

Scruffy was a generous description of Niro Noodles, but Rey knew she was right about the food. Ben ate slowly, like it was something he’d practiced. Likely he had, given what she could vaguely remember of his background. A senator, and royal lineage to boot. Rich all his life and dressed far nicer than anyone on this entire street. None of the ornamentation she would expect of the representative of Naboo, however.

Rey ate like a heathen, not even waiting until she'd swallowed one bite before she'd shove another in her mouth. She knew this about herself, and could reign it in most of the time. But it had been two full days since she’d eaten much of anything, and if it put Ben off, so be it. At least she got a free meal out of this strange transaction.

She finished well before he did, which made her feel unsteady for just a moment. Then he signaled their waiter and ordered her another bowl. He waited until it arrived and she was tucked in again before speaking.

“So, Rey from nowhere.”

Rey glanced up from her noodles and found him watching her intently, dark eyes serious.

“I know you're probably busy. What should I pay you to keep me company for the rest of the night? Just to talk, not anything else.”

Rey chewed her lip, looking this man over. Pretty, in an odd, inconvenient way. Reserved, but of course he was. Confident, because he asked what he should pay rather than what he could pay.

“I don't do the entire night,” she said. That wasn't entirely true—this was just the first time she'd been offered.

“Play pretend that you do. How much?”

Politician.

“A thousand,” Rey said. It was a fun number to play with, far and beyond what she'd ever brought home in a night. She hoped it made him laugh again, not walk away. She liked his crooked teeth.

“Done,” Ben said easily.

Rey blinked at him, her joke apparently not landing. Her lips pursed.

“A thousand credits.” That was her month’s rent, and then some. “Just to talk to you.”

He nodded solemnly. “Just to talk to me.”

Rey suddenly wished that she had brought her staff with her this evening. She was about to make a foolish decision, and she was afraid it might be the first of many.

“All right.”

Hosnian Prime was a pretty planet, as urban worlds went, but this was the black district. It was underground, three levels beneath the surface, lit by pale green lights that gave the whole place a spooky air. Here you could find whatever you wanted: spice, unregistered courtesans, F-class animals, banned weapons, organs, slaves. A nightmare for the Hosnian police.

Ben kept the hood of his grey robes up as Rey led them to a nearby hostel. The chances of being recognized here were low, but Rey supposed a senator could never be too careful. It wouldn't do to be caught on holocamera by anyone.

Rey walked slightly ahead of him, leading the way. She wore her hair up in a bun, showing off her back, which this white dress left entirely bare. She could feel eyes on her, she always could when she was dressed for the evening. But most of all, she could feel Ben’s stare. Tracing her lines as if stroking his fingers over her skin.

He wasn’t acting as if he only intended to talk with her.

“Here we are,” Rey said. “This place is my favorite. Hardly any rodents.” She smirked, enjoying how her joke made him squirm.

Ben checked them in for the night, which got a raised brow from the clerk. He wasn’t used to the whole night being bought, either.

Rey led the way to their room, a clean but small set-up, with a bed large enough for mischief and soft enough for sleep. Rey wondered if she’d get either tonight.

Ben was poking around the room, obviously nervous and Rey just sat on the bed to watch. He’d bought the evening, so he could do what he liked. What he liked, apparently, was scoping out the dimensions of the closet.

“Do they do room service here?” Ben asked, after opening and closing the closet door a few times, and fiddling with the hinges.

“We just ate,” Rey said. “And...no.”

Ben pulled the hard metal chair away from its matching desk and dragged it closer to Rey. It looked uncomfortable, but it gave him somewhere to sit besides the bed. He ran a hand through his hair, tugging for only an instant before yanking his hand away. Likely someone had told him that this gesture made him look nervous all over, had trained it out of him so he could stand in the public eye.

Rey smiled softly at the idea that she made him lose his composure.

“You’re something else,” Ben said.

Rey snorted. Such meaningful conversation. She only uncrossed her legs, parting them a bit, and said, “Am I?”

Ben breathed deep, trying not to look at where her thighs were parted. He was interested. It was written all over him, in every nervous twitch of his hands and the careful aversion of his gaze when she spread her legs another inch. Definitely interested. Then why wasn't he doing something about it?

Rey reached down, pulling off her boots and socks, flexing her toes and pointing her feet. Long and narrow, she knew that clients in the past had been quite interested in her oddly elegant feet.

Ben only blushed.

“I know what to do if you want me to take charge, you know? I can make you feel good, make you feel less nervous.”

He wavered, hesitating in his seat. Rey was certain that if she moved his hair from his face and laid her lips at his temple, she’d taste the bitter salt of an anxious sweat.

Then he jerked, stood, shrugging out of his robes and pulling his tunic over his head.

“I’ve had contraceptive and prophylactic shots. You?”

Rey smiled kindly. She was earning her keep after all.

“Yes. I have my charts on my holo if you'd like to check them. I'm up to date.”

“No,” he said. “I don't… that's okay. I believe you.”

_That was a weird thing to say._

Rey stood, plucking at the buttons at the neck of her backless dress. She pulled the garment down, baring her modest chest to Ben.

He looked at her, a ruddy stain stealing over his cheeks before he averted his gaze yet again, working on the falls of his trousers.

Rey bit back a chuckle. It was almost endearing to see someone so nervous to pay for sex, so unsure and outright polite. It tugged at places inside her she thought long dead.

Apparently her girlishness was only buried beneath the sand, corroded and barely passable for scrap—but not dead. She wasn't dead yet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks so much for reading. We’d love it if you let us know your thoughts, so please take a moment to leave a comment below. :)


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a quick note that this is a multi-chapter project. We're unsure how many words at this point, but what we have outlined is going to take several chapters to resolve. We hope you're up for it! :)

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This should be an easy transaction. He could have so much for so little, the use of Rey’s body for a few measly credits, and he wouldn’t have to worry about giving anything more. There was a simplicity to this that appealed to him, knowing he could find pleasure without having to offer any pieces of himself that mattered. Ben needed that, the protection that could come with distance.

But if their arrangement was truly so easy, he wouldn’t be shaking like this. His hands trembled, as unsteady as he felt when he stripped out of the rest of his clothes.

This was stupid. Rey was an unregistered, low-class courtesan, as illegal to purchase as anything else on the black market. And he liked her. She was clever, forward, hardheaded—and Force-sensitive. Instead of telling her the truth, like he’d intended, he was lying. Lying, and paying to fuck her.

As soon as she finished undressing, Rey sat on the edge of the bed, and the sight of her naked was enough to distract him from his anxiety. She was perfect, her body crafted in long lines and modest curves. So beautiful, bare just for him.

“Ben?” she said, a question-but-not, asking him to come to bed.

This was stupid, yes, but he was doing it anyway, and he might as well take what he wanted without stumbling through it.

Ben wanted to push her down and kiss her little breasts, so he did. Rey grabbed his hair, moaning as he licked from the underside of her breast to her pink nipple, then sucked. Her cries were too loud to be genuine, but that would change soon. She hadn’t been wearing panties, and it was easy enough to reach between her legs, to feel that she wasn’t as wet as he wanted her to be. He rubbed her where she most needed attention, quick circles that made her moans quieter but higher. Real. Ben kept at it until she was bucking against his fingers, biting her knuckles, reaching for a pleasure that he dangled just out of reach.

When he pushed two fingers inside her she made the prettiest sound, silk soft, more breath than voice. She was wet now, and so tight, almost like she was new for him when that was far from the truth.

Rey was close, but Ben didn’t want that yet. He wasn’t ready to make her come, and it pleased some small, mean part of him to work her up without finishing her.

So he stopped, wiped off his slick fingers on her thigh, and said, “Get on your hands and knees.”

Rey froze, surprise written around her open mouth. It was gone in an instant, that tender expression replaced by something closed-off, professional but invulnerable. She got into the position he’d ordered, arched her back and spread her legs, presenting herself lewdly for him. This was all he’d paid for, a hot, wet fuck in a rented room. So it seemed that was all she was going to give him.

Ben barely choked back a groan as he brought his cock to Rey’s sex. Her body welcomed him with slick heat as he pushed inside, so good that he almost couldn’t stand it. He kept his thrusts deep and rough but slow, because he didn’t want this to be over too soon. It had been a long time since he’d had a chance to have sex, and he wasn’t about to make it quick and easy on Rey. She’d gone back to her falsetto moans, put-on cries that he wasn’t going to let her get away with.

He kept her hips steady, not allowing her to rock back against him, just holding her still and open for his use. It took a moment of having her harder for Ben to realize what Rey liked best and how to unravel her. Then she was breathing hard, sobbing soft and damp, so prettily that it pushed him right to the edge, but Ben didn’t let himself fall over it. He hadn’t felt this in control in longer than he could remember, and he wasn’t ready to stop yet.

Rey must hate him for taking her like this, teasing her with a release that he refused to give. It wasn’t kind, or necessary, or part of this bargain, but Ben kept at it. He owned this girl at least for the night, and she was his to toy with. It stoked something cold and sharp inside him, a taste of the darkness he missed.

“Are you close?” he asked.

“Yes,” Rey gasped. “Please, let me—let me come.”

Ben thrust faster making her beg, shake, wail.

Then he slowed again. “No. I don’t think I will.”

Not yet anyway.

Rey arched, clutching herself around him, and Ben couldn’t hold back anymore, not with her body so tight around his cock. He came hard enough that it shook him from head to toe, his whole body on fire, jolts of heat sparking over him as he shouted, pounding into her. Filling her, pressing his spend as far into her body as it could go.

As soon as he came down, Ben pulled out of Rey, pushed her flat to the bed, and flipped her onto her back. He settled over her, then kissed her forehead, her cheek, the tip of her nose. Giving all the gentleness he’d denied her while they were fucking.

“Can I kiss you on the mouth?” he asked, feeling oddly shy all over again.

Rey looked up at him with obvious confusion. “Yes?” she said.

It was odd, kissing a woman he’d already been inside. Ben had never done this out of order before, but Rey was turning everything upside down and driving him to break all kinds of rules.

She opened her mouth to him willingly enough, and he kissed her deeply, tenderly. She was messy, unpracticed, which was sadder than he could name. Rey had undoubtedly had plenty of paying lovers, but it seemed few of them had bothered to kiss her.

Not that he’d treated her well. Far from it, and shame was setting in now that his lust had been seen to. He wanted to kiss Rey all night and have her again, this time for her pleasure more than his, and skip work tomorrow morning. Which was exactly why he shouldn’t be doing any of this.

Ben had needed something simple, to keep his feelings in a box while he took what he wanted. But he’d never been any good at that, and using Rey hadn’t helped a bit.

He tried to make his kiss into an apology, pouring it into her, sip by sip, as his mouth worked over hers.

_I’m no good at this. Selfish. Needed you._

He tried to cup her face, but Rey twisted out from under him, wiping her lips with the back of her hand like she wanted to rid her mouth of his taste.

“Enough kissing.”

Ben hadn’t expected that, to be told to do anything, but he was glad of it. Relieved to know that Rey wouldn’t submit to whatever he tried to give her without regard for her own wants. Although he found it curious that, of everything he’d done to her tonight, _kissing_ had pushed her limits.

He sat back on his knees, sucked on three fingers, and pressed them to her sex, still wet with her need and his come. He could make this up to her, make it so good she’d never want him out of her bed.

“I won’t tease you,” he said. “I’ll take care of you this time, sweetheart. I promise.”

“No promises,” she said, lying back and posturing for him. “Do it or don’t, it all pays the same.”

That irritated Ben more than he had any right to, but he pushed it down.

He worked Rey with no patience and little tenderness, thrusting his fingers into her as roughly as he dared.

“You’re so pretty,” he said, taking her harder, higher. “Prettiest thing I’ve ever had my hands on.”

It was true, and even if Rey didn’t believe him she clearly liked hearing it. She was quiet this time, stubbornly holding in her moans, but she couldn’t stop her harsh breathing or hide the way she arched into his touch. Taking, wanting, needing everything he gave her.

Ben unraveled her with three fingers and sugared words. That was all he had to do, work her hard and talk her soft, and she lost her grip on her control.

Rey kept quiet when she came. He dragged one climax from her, then another, but she gritted her teeth and squeezed her eyes shut. Stubborn, spiteful, beautiful girl.

He could feel a fierce shiver of the Force rumbling through the room, rattling the glass on the bedside table. Ben would hate to see what would happen if Rey learned to reach into the energy around her, or if anger drove her to misuse it. He’d love to see it too.

Ben said her name, praising her and coaxing her by turns, until she settled. He didn’t take his fingers from her when she collapsed back against the pillows.

He was breathless and trembling, a wreck just from taking Rey apart. She lay panting on the bed, her sex still pulsing around his fingers, fluttering through the last aftershocks of her orgasm. He curled his fingers one more time, hitting that sensitive spot she loved, making her yelp. Her first unrestrained sound since he’d set about pleasing her.

Ben finally let her go, but he brought his fingers to her mouth and told her to suck them clean. He gave the order gently, but it was an order nonetheless, to make her taste the pleasure he’d just given her. Rey glared at him as she licked up the remains of her wet and his come, but she did it all the same.

Ben rolled onto his back and brought Rey along so that she was sprawled on top of him. She made an undignified noise, and Ben laughed at her, but not with much vigor.

“I’m exhausted,” he said. “Let’s sleep, yeah?”

“I don’t sleep,” she said.

He gave her the most unimpressed look he could.

“I don’t sleep with clients, I mean. _Sleep_ sleep. I fuck, then I fuck off.”

“Well you can’t fuck off until morning,” Ben reminded her.

Rey sat up, straddling his waist. He could feel the damp between her legs, their mess wetting his stomach.

“You paid to _just talk_ all night,” Rey said, rolling her eyes.

Ben swallowed, flushing so hotly that he had to be red from his forehead to his chest.

“I want another five hundred for the sex, and on top of that, to sleep here…” She looked away from him, frowning. No doubt trying to think up a ridiculous sum. “A thousand.”

“Twenty-five hundred credits?” Ben asked. “Are you serious?”

Rey shrugged. “You can afford it.”

“All right,” Ben said. Her price was ridiculous, but he’d pay it if that’s what it took to keep her in this bed. “Now get under the covers with me. It’s cold.”

.

.

_Twenty-five hundred credits._

That was over a month of work, all for a really enjoyable lay and a warm, clean bed. Oh! And dinner. He’d also bought her dinner.

Rey almost felt guilty for demanding so much, but he hadn’t even tried to haggle with her. Just rolled over and showed her his credit lined belly. She’d been able to tell that Ben Solo was a strange one from the moment she met him, and this was the most potent proof yet. But the bed was soft and the company smelled wonderful, like wealthy, not-quite-clean man. She was well-fed and well-had, something she’d never been able to say about herself before.

So when he pulled her in close, breathing in the scent of her cheap shampoo like it was fresh cut flowers, she didn’t stop him. She let him tuck her naked into his wide, warm body, and squeeze the breath out of her with a heavy arm at her middle. She didn’t know this man, but she even allowed herself to fall under, figuring it was her due if he murdered her in her sleep.

Rey woke hours later, a tender noise torn from her throat as she felt Ben flicking his thumb across her nipple, drawing it to an attentive peak. Sleep leached from her edges and she wanted him to keep touching her, make her wet and ready again. Put her on her back and fuck her again, get her off with his cock inside her, the way she knew he could.

But even though there were no windows in his underground motel, Rey knew it was getting late, and Ben would need to leave soon. Get up, get out of here. Get back to his life.

Even if he got another quickie from her, this night was over. It was over.

“I want to see you again. Tomorrow night.”

Rey stirred, groaning and stretching, feeling heavy and sated. His hands stopped wandering, but he wasn’t pulling away from her either.

“Tomorrow night?” she asked, not quite following. She felt slow and stupid, two steps behind him.

“Yes,” Ben said. “I'll pay for you to stay here, if you want. Keep the bed warm for me while I'm gone.”

That jolted her awake. Rey sat up, looking down at the man sprawled in the bed. _Gods_ he was beautiful first thing in the morning. Fucked out and messy, so warm she could feel him wafting heat from beneath the covers.

“I can't just stay here.”

He tugged her back down, holding her close enough to bruise. Fear should be her gut-reaction to this, but it was tender want she felt instead. Rey couldn’t remember the last time she’d been held.

“You can if I pay enough.”

There was a sharp sting at the corners of her eyes, a dull throb in her chest. Rey pulled away from him. “You can't afford that. I have to work. To eat.”

“I know you’ve been gouging me, sweetheart, but I don’t mind.” Ben sat up and manhandled her onto his lap so that she was straddling him. “I’ll give you another three thousand, cover the room, and pay for your meals if you stay here for me.”

Rey tugged at the ends of her hair, looking over his shoulder. Ben Solo was a spoiled brat, trying to buy her, not like a woman whose services could be paid for, but like a thing that could be owned. It hurt, but half the pain was temptation.

Ben grabbed her chin and made her meet his gaze. “And no working while I’m gone. All right?”

Rey grimaced. “I just wait here. For you.”

“Yes,” he said, his smile growing. “Eat something, watch a trashy drama. Sleep all day. Take a miniature vacation. Just be here tomorrow night and don't sleep with anyone else.”

She chewed her cheek. No. She couldn’t.

“Thirty-five hundred,” Ben said, his eyes watching her so closely she swore she could feel his gaze on her skin.

_Six thousand credits. For practically nothing._ It was foolish to turn this down, ridiculous to walk away.

“Okay,” she said, feeling soft. So she straightened, stopped chewing her cheek and pressed her lips into a hard line. “But I want the money in advance. I don't want you to stick me with a hotel bill I can't afford if you don't come back.”

Ben laughed. “I wasn’t born yesterday. If I give you all the money now you have no reason to wait here.”

Rey scowled and tried to climb off of him, but Ben wrapped his arms around her before she could get away.

“I’m a courtesan, not a thief,” she grunted, struggling in his grip.

“And I’m not a cheap bastard who would stand you up,” Ben snapped. “I’ll give you all but the last thousand. Fair?”

“Fine!” she hissed, and he let her go. It was a long moment before she fully realized what she was agreeing to. Two days and a night of nothing. Of waiting for Ben to come back, and just resting and eating and lounging till then. Like a proper lady of leisure.

He was smiling, though it didn’t quite touch his eyes. The grin of a man who won, not of a man who was pleased.

Rey ducked and kissed him, because she felt like she should. He was the first person to ever give her a day off, and he seemed to like kissing.

Ben groaned into her mouth, a sound first of pleasure, then frustration. He pulled away and said, “I’m late for work already. I need to go.”

Rey ran her fingers through his hair, an unwanted softness catching in her throat. She wanted a happy smile. She wanted--

“Then go.”

Ben kissed her forehead. “Soon. I want to hold you for another minute.”

She tried her best to not look into this. To stay hard and strong through it. But when he tried nothing beyond kissing lazily at her temple, Rey found that this wasn't so simple as it had been before. She let herself be held, be kissed, and when he stood up from the bed, her whine was an honest, pathetic noise.

Rey had told Ben to leave, but in truth, she wanted him to stay.


	3. Chapter 3

.

.

Ben was over an hour late to the monthly Mid Rim Trade Coalition meeting. Naboo’s most valuable commodity was its beauty, and his homeworld made far more money drawing in tourists than by selling its native resources, so he didn’t have much to add to a meeting about the exportation of fuels and metals. He still got sharp, side-eyed looks from several of his fellow senators, especially the Populists.

He drank a cup of caf as he listened to the representatives from Shu-Torun and Takodana cutting through each other’s arguments with little finesse and no respect, interrupting and raising their voices. The committee chair, Nala Palee of Malastare, told them to sit down and shut up, if in much more senatorial terms.

This was a waste of time. He had to outline his next speech, edit the latest draft of the standardized education bill, and prep for tomorrow’s dinner with his mother. Well, it was the “Biannual Bipartisan Soiree”, meant to foster good will between the Centrists and Populists. A bacta patch on an amputation, far too little too late when their parties had grown so hostile toward each other. But the most prominent senators both conservative and liberal would be there, and this time his mother was hosting it.

Ben’s attention drifted around the third hour of the committee meeting. He thought of Rey, of the night they’d shared, strange and reckless and intoxicating. It was foolish, what he’d done, what he was still doing. Keeping a courtesan stowed away in a cheap motel, waiting on his return like a paid housewife. Ridiculous.

He wondered what Rey was doing this morning. Had she gone back to sleep, still worn out from the thorough fucking he’d given her? Or perhaps she’d decided to take advantage of her sudden windfall. Ben imagined her buying a fancy breakfast, gobbling her expensive food without any grace, and had to bite the inside of his cheek to keep from smiling.

Ben’s personal assistant, Aila, took notes on the meeting, and as soon as it was over, she said, “That was informative.”

“If by informative you mean completely unnecessary,” Ben said. “No one would compromise and nothing was accomplished. As per usual.”

Aila smiled but didn’t say anything. She was a no-nonsense woman, which he liked, and willing to do everything he tasked her with competently and quickly, which he liked even better.

She’d organized his files on the education bill this morning (while he was busy sleeping with Rey), so Ben had everything he needed to begin his edits. It was early evening already, and he would be here late, but that was what he got for playing hooky last night.

This draft was a mess. Half the Centrists in the subcommittee wanted to play it safe, appeal to the Populists closer to the middle of the aisle by compromising on mandated secondary education. The other half wanted to shove the most radical plan possible in their rivals’ faces, standardizing everything right down to quarterly tests. And leave this bill in a year of rejection and revision hell, he supposed.

After three hours of cleaning up his far-left colleagues’ work, Ben was exhausted, starving, and distracted. He set aside his datapad, put his head in his hands, and groaned. He was useless today, and it was obvious why.

Rey was waiting on him, but he couldn’t see her until tomorrow night. It had been a long while since he’d had a lover; the Senate simply kept him too busy, and because he wasn’t interested in anything long-term, his flings were never sustainable. But this could be different. Rey would meet him with opens arms—and legs—as long as he paid her well, which he could do indefinitely.

He drank another cup of caf, his fourth of the day, and settled down, determined to get through at least half of this goddamn bill before he went home.

.

.

Rey lay in bed for about half an hour after Ben left, then got up and took a bath. It wasn't as if this motel boasted an indulgent tub, but any time she had the chance to fill a basin with hot water and sink into it, Rey considered it the highest luxury. She scrubbed and shaved and soaked, draining and refreshing the water twice before getting out.

Then she ate a pre-dawn breakfast. The credits Ben had left behind for food would have paid for a junkyard speeder, or an elegant five course meal, but she only spent a tiny fraction of it on a greasy, starchy breakfast of fried red-yolked eggs over a spicy hash with three types of meat, none of which Rey recognized. She ate the large bowl of food in its entirety, sitting on the curb next to the restaurant stall and enjoying the strange bustle of the almost-morning underground.

Then she went back to the motel, took off all her clothes, and climbed naked into the bed. She didn't wake until noon.

Rey ordered in lunch, then spent her afternoon watching holodramas. She made it halfway through her second one before she got bored. She wasn't used to her nights being so empty.

It wasn't as if bedsport was her favorite thing, but it wasn't her least favorite either. It couldn’t be, given her profession. While she’d of course rather do something else with her life than sleep with strangers for what few credits they’d give her, it was at least something to do.

Rey got up, feeling like Ben as she fiddled with the door to the closet. She could go out, but what if Ben came back early? Not that he had reason to, and he’d only asked her to be here when he got back tomorrow night. It wasn’t as if she had to stay put.

Something about leaving the room he’d bought for her felt dishonest, however, and Rey flopped onto the bed in a huff. She wished she’d demanded something to occupy her time, at least a damn novel to read.

.

.

Ben wore a black suit to the soiree, high necked and plain. He didn’t have his mother’s flair for fashion; maybe if she’d kept him around as a child instead of shipping him off to Uncle Luke he’d have better taste in clothes.

He drank Cheedoan whiskey with Count Jogurner, a taciturn Populist who was about as interested in this event as he was.

“Enjoying the festivities?”

Ben looked up to see Lady Carise, dressed in striking emerald robes. It took all of his political training to smile. She was pretty, a member of the Elder Houses, and a staunch Centrist. Sometime in the last year Carise had determined that their shared nobility and political beliefs made them something like friends, and Ben wasn’t in the mood for dealing with her tonight.

“Not my favorite venue,” he said.

Carise looked around his mother’s apartment—spacious and well-appointed, but not frivolous—and shook her head. “I have to agree.”

“Still, I should at least say hello.” Ben nodded toward his mother. “Excuse me.”

Leia Organa was every bit as beautiful now as she’d been in her youth. Softer, greyer, but no less regal, no less lovely. And she still knew how to command a crowd, if the Senators gathered around her were anything to go by.

His father was an idiot for spending half his time off-world.

She smiled brightly when he approached. “Ben. I’m so glad you came.”

As if he had much choice. “Of course.”

He smiled back, the warmest greeting he allowed these days. The last time they’d hugged he was a boy of nine, clinging to her like seaweed. He’d sworn to do better, be better, if she’d only keep him. But no, it was the Jedi path for him—until it wasn’t.

Ben slipped back among the people grouped around Leia, carefully drawing away. He wondered if he could get away with a third whiskey without instigating rumors.

It was going to be a long night.

.

.

Rey was catapulting a wad of paper against the room door when it opened. She’d found an old wire hanger in the closet she and Ben both seemed to be drawn to and had constructed a rudimentary trebuchet. It kept her busy for an hour and a half.

“Finally!” Rey said as Ben stepped through the door. “I was ready to go stand on the street corner just to have someone to talk to.”

“Not like that, I hope.”

Rey was as naked as the day she was born, shamelessly proud of the pretty picture she made.

Ben started stripping out of his suit, already hard. He unbuckled his belt, nodded toward the bed, and said, “On your back. Now.”

Rey skittered to the bed, a giddy smile stealing over her face. “It’s good to see you again, too, Senator.”

She made a show of arching her back, posing herself on the neat coverlet with her ankles primly crossed.

Ben uncrossed her legs and trailed kisses from her ankle to her knee. “Getting bored without me?”

Rey shifted, her breath catching sharp in her chest. “Very.”

Ben mouthed his way to her belly, wet and messy, perfect. He nipped her hip bone, sucked on it, then smiled against her skin. “I’ll do my best to keep you entertained.”

The last thing she expected Senator Solo to do after two days away was to go down on her, much less with the intent to get her off. But here he was, kneeling on the duvet, giving her excellent head and showing no signs of stopping until he made her come.

Rey threaded her fingers through his long, heavy hair, gripping and releasing the higher he took her. His mouth was hot and insistent on her, focusing his attention exactly where she needed it.

Giving it to her. Just, giving it to her.

Rey told herself that she was going to be quiet again this time, but when Ben hooked a single finger inside her there at the very end, she didn’t have much choice but to cry out. He coaxed a release from her in no time at all, and she’d never been a particularly quick study. Perhaps it was his eagerness, near stubbornness, that bewitched her body.

Whatever it was, she liked it, and she came very happily, and very loudly.

Ben was grinning, smug and self-satisfied, when he crawled on top of her.

“Are you always that easy?” he asked.

Rey shook her head. “Just for you.”

“Is that so?”

Before Rey could answer, he brought their bodies together, pushing all the way into her with one thrust.

“Yes!” she gasped, though she wasn’t sure if it was in answer to his snotty question or at the sensation of being so thoroughly filled. She was still tender and sensitive from her climax, and his harsh slide into her body threatened to send her off again.

Rey dug her short nails into his back, biting down on his shoulder for good measure. Stars, but he felt good inside of her. She wasn’t so fanciful to think things like _a perfect fit_ or _made for her_ , but Ben Solo was exactly her brand of liquor when he got her on her back.

She clawed at him, trying to hold herself together when she was already close to falling apart. If she’d ever had it so good she couldn’t remember. Rey really was easy just for him, a truth she’d only told because Ben would think it was a lie. She was getting close again, not two minutes into this, unable to do anything but quiver and whine every time he rocked into her.

“Nearly there.” He took her harder, giving her the roughness she needed to reach the edge. “Just let it happen, sweetheart.”

It was _sweetheart_ that did it, which pissed Rey off. The harsh strokes, the deep stretch all brought her close, but one honeyed word and she was squealing through another damned orgasm.

He was kissing her again, tender touches at her temple and over her eyelid. Sweet, so achingly sweet. Rey tried to turn her face away, but that had him brushing his lips over her ear, her neck, his hips jerking clumsily until he came three breaths behind her.

Ben was too heavy to give his full weight to her, but he made her take it for a moment anyway. His body covered every inch of hers, guarding, possessive.

Rey squirmed under him and beat at his shoulder. “Get off.”

Ben didn’t go anywhere, but he propped himself up, arms braced on either side of her so that he wasn’t squashing her anymore. His idea of a compromise, she supposed.

Rey glared up at him, somehow more annoyed now that he’d given her pleasure than she’d been when he’d withheld it.

“You’re even prettier when you’re angry,” Ben said. “Maybe I should irritate you on purpose, just so I can see that lovely frown.”

Rey bared her teeth at him in a snarl she hoped was less attractive to him. “Wouldn’t take much practice on your part, Senator. You have a natural talent.”

Ben grabbed her hair and yanked her head back, baring her throat to him. He sucked at her pulse point, marking her with an anger that made her weak-limbed and needy again.

“I have a name,” he said. “Use it or I’ll make you scream it.”

Rey felt her cheeks heat, but she didn’t give her useless flush any more credit than it was due. “Such a feeble threat, Ben,” she said. “Treating a pleasure like it’s a punishment.”

She bit her lip and looked away from him. The comment had been more biting in her head, less mooning and lovesick.

It didn’t matter whether fucking around with Ben Solo was a pleasure or not. This was almost finished. He’d hand over the remaining thousand he owed her and they’d part ways. If she was lucky, she could get one more meal out of him, maybe another kiss on the mouth. But there wasn’t much else for her.


	4. Chapter 4

.

.

Ben climbed off of Rey, the way she’d asked him to a few moments ago. He wanted to lie close enough to touch her, but that was a needy impulse, and he didn’t like it. So he gave her the space she undoubtedly wanted anyway.

Rey was a hardheaded, mouthy girl, quick tempered and unpolished. Good on her back, yes, but that wasn’t why the sex unraveled him so much. She intrigued him, made him want more when dallying with her was already immeasurably foolish.

Ben brushed her hair away from her face, then stroked her temple with his thumb. He closed his eyes and let himself savor the softness of her skin, the warm glow of the Force pulsing all around her, flowing through her the same way it flowed through him.

When he looked at her, Rey was frowning again, but softly now. Confused, not angry.

“What do you want for dinner?” Ben asked. “I’ll go out and get it for us.”

“Please take me with you. Or let me go get it? I can’t stay cooped up in this room anymore.”

Ben got out of bed and started pulling on his clothes.

“Get dressed,” he said. “We can go wherever you want.” 

He was a fucking idiot, taking an unregistered courtesan to dinner in the worst part of Republic City. For a second time. 

Reckless, impulsive, self-destructive: Uncle Luke had thrown all those accusations at him and more half a lifetime ago. 

Well, he hadn’t been wrong. 

Rey took him to a small seafood restaurant she’d discovered during their two days apart. She ordered for both of them, and Ben couldn’t keep from sneering at the dish set before him. More than one type of tentacle wiggled in his bowl. 

“Don’t worry,” Rey giggled. “It stops moving once you pour the sauce over it.”

Ben would have tried to hold in his opinions about the cuisine at this fine establishment, but Rey seemed to revel in his snobbery, so he didn’t bother. 

He doused his tentacle salad in enough brown sauce to drown its squirming. 

“You’ve got to be kidding me,” he said.

Rey’s cheeks were round and full when she mumbled, “It’s delicious.”

Ben speared a blessedly still tentacle on the tines of his fork. It looked rubbery. 

“Coward,” Rey said.

He laughed. “I’ve eaten worse, I promise.”

She set down her fork, took a long drink of her purple soda, and said, “I have a hard time believing that you’ve ever wanted for good food.” 

Ben tried the tentacles. They were surprisingly tender, the sauce rich. Not bad at all.

“I spent six years training to be a Jedi. It’s a plain life. You’re not allowed any possessions apart from your lightsaber and your clothes. No attachments, no passions. I wasn’t very good at it—obviously.”

He dared to glance up at Rey, who was watching him, wide-eyed. Then he shrugged and said, “Anyway, the food at the temple was terrible. I don’t know if that was supposed to suppress gluttony or just a matter of funds.” 

Rey stared at him, an orange noodle dangling from her lips. She slurped it up, swallowed, and asked, “Do you—the Force?” 

Ben would have found her awe much funnier if he hadn’t known what she was. 

“Yes,” he said simply. “The Force runs strong in my family. But I wasn’t suited to Jedi life, so here I am.”

“How can you be so blasé about all of this?” Rey asked. “It’s amazing!”

Ben couldn’t think of an answer before she gestured wildly, hands windmilling in small, rapid circles. “Do something.”

“What?”

“Do something!” Rey said again, tapping the table. “Make—make something float. Or—oh! Do you still have your lightsaber? I’d like to see that!”

The Force was not a party trick, and it would be irresponsible to use it to impress a girl.

Not that he particularly cared.

Ben glanced around the restaurant, satisfied to find that the only other customers were far across the room. He summoned the bottle of brown sauce to his hand, then floated it across the table to Rey. Her eyes went as wide as the empty bowl in front of her. 

“What else can you do?” she asked.

He stopped, tempted, before saying, “Nothing that I can show you in a public restaurant.”

“Then let’s go back to the hotel!”

Ben sighed so heavily that it felt he emptied himself of something vital. Probably his patience. “I thought you were sick of the hotel. Bored out of your mind.”

“You showing me what else you can do with the bloody Force is the furthest thing from boring! It’s the most exciting thing I’ve seen in my entire life!”

Rey looked thrilled, staring at him with the sort of wonder that children held for new discoveries. The Force had that effect on people who were uneducated about it, which was nearly everyone.

Ben relented, if only because Rey's smile was so warm and he didn't want to go back to her frowns, no matter how pretty they were. 

She bombarded him with questions all the way back to the hotel. 

“Can you really make people do whatever you want?” Rey asked. “Oh, and why do darksiders always have red lightsabers? Is it just a fashion thing?”

Ben took her hand in his. She seemed happy enough to allow it.

He ignored her question about lightsabers (the less he had to answer about the dark side, the better), and said, “I can't make just anyone do anything, but yes, there are ways to trick the vulnerable into following orders.”

Rey laughed. “I don't believe it. Try it on me!”

Ben hurried ahead. “Wouldn't work on you. You're too strong willed.”

And too strong in the Force. 

He would tell her the truth, Ben decided. As soon as he was ready to let her go.

.

.

Once they got back to the hotel, Ben was all kisses and needy caresses, exhibitions of the Force forgotten. He seemed to have something to prove, and was willing to break her in half to do it. Rey didn't mind a bit if it meant he'd keep fucking her hard and deep, drawing this out to the point of frustration. 

Ben had her in measured strokes, her legs over his shoulders, making it last. He’d been impatient earlier, greedy to make her come again and to get his, but he took his time now. Rey knew she’d be begging to stop before he was finished with her, so well used that she wouldn’t be able to take a step tomorrow without thinking of him.

He appeared to be fine with getting her off, but he gave no quarter beyond that. He fucked her through her orgasm and was building her to a second when she finally spoke up. 

“Ben!” she gasped. “I need a moment, please! It's—it's too much.” 

Ben stopped, then pulled away, hissing when their bodies parted. Rey whined, bucking up against nothing, instantly regretting that she’d asked him to stop. He turned her onto her belly, muffling her startled cry against the pillows. Then he was on her, inside her again.

“There,” he grunted. “That was a moment.”

“Fuck!” Rey shrieked as he pressed her into the bed, taking her so thoroughly she couldn't breathe. The climb to her second orgasm was arduous, near painful. 

She was whimpering, pleading with nothing for some relief. “Please, gods, please—I need—”

Ben gripped her hips, rolling into her with a violence that should have ruined her by now. 

Then, as if he'd been holding the reigns the entire time, she felt a catch within her, a clutch, and then—

“Finally, finally, yes—yes, thank gods yes—” 

“Thank me, sweetheart. Gods didn’t have anything to do with this.” 

If Rey had had an ounce of her willpower left she’d have told him to go to hell.

Ben gentled his thrusts, giving her a moment to rest, to sob into the bedding in peace—but not for long.

Being taken like this had torn at something raw in her, ripped open needs she didn’t want to look at closely. Every inch of her body hummed with pleasure, focused where she was joined with Ben. The rest of the world went quiet when he rocked into her, hard and fast again, leaving just the two of them here, alone in a rented bed. Rey tried to catch her breath, to think, to feel anything besides Ben, but she couldn’t, she couldn’t.

She felt lost, helpless, beyond pleasure now, all tender, overwhelmed flesh. She was babbling, nonsense that didn't deter Ben from fucking her, drawing her outside of her own body. 

Maybe this was a part of the Force he controlled, this mingling, a sensation that felt like more than just sex. 

“Ben,” she whispered, not sure what she wanted. Perhaps to ask if he felt it too, this affinity that ached in her throat. “Ben.”

Rey kept saying his name, gasping it again and again, because he’d stolen all other speech from her. 

Ben came, rocking into her so hard it hurt, the sweetest kind of brutality. And once it was done, both of them boneless, Rey had to bite her lip to keep from crying aloud. The noise choked in the back of her throat, a sob smothered before it had a chance to be born.

Ben was lying heavily on top of her, his cock softened inside her and his skin chilled with sweat. Spent, as utterly as she was. 

She thought of her hovel of an apartment several blocks away, her green things growing under a lamp. They'd need water; she'd been gone for two days. She would have to go back to that. To her small room that contained her small life, far away from the man pressing her into the mattress. Back to sleeping with creatures that weren't Ben Solo. 

She didn't like the idea. Didn't want to look directly at it. But she would have to, sooner or later; she'd have to get out of bed and carry on. 

Ben climbed off of her languidly, like he didn’t quite have the energy for it. In minutes, he fell asleep beside her, and oh, he was beautiful. Pale and ill-proportioned. Expanses of muscle under fragile skin. Full mouth slack in sleep. 

Now would be a good time to leave. She didn't need the final thousand. The rest would keep her well enough for two months. 

But she was drained, like he'd siphoned out all her energy to bolster his own when he'd had her with such abandon. She could sleep for just a moment, rest until she could stand without wobbling. Ben shifted, slinging a heavy arm over her, making the choice for her. 

When Rey woke a couple hours later, she gathered up her things as quietly as she could. She was still dressing when Ben sat up, alert and angry. Then he got out of the bed to catch her by her wrist.

“Where are you going?”

Rey blinked up at him. “H-home, Ben. I'm going home.”

“So you were just planning to sneak out,” he said. “Not even going to say goodbye.”

Rey pulled her hand from his grasp and finished buttoning her dress; her boots were already on her feet. If he’d woken up three minutes later than he had, she’d have been out the door, disappearing into the black district. He never would have found her then.

Rey kept her voice flat when she said, “It’s morning. The time you paid for is up.” 

“Except I haven’t paid you the last thousand yet. That eager to get away?”

Rey felt a hot pressure building behind her eyes, a knot in her throat. She didn't know how to answer. _Yes_ was the truth, but not for any of the reasons he might think. She had to get away because she _wanted to stay_. And that alone was dangerous. 

“You were overpaying anyway,” Rey said in lieu of answering. 

Ben pulled her to him and wrapped his arms around her. An embrace meant to keep here, to trap her. 

“I don't want you to go,” he said. “Please.”

Rey laid her hands on his chest, resting her head on his clavicle. He was naked, his skin hot and soft, and she wanted nothing more than to take off her clothes and climb back into bed with him. 

“Ben. You—you know what this is. You know I have to go.”

He hugged her close, and Rey breathed in his scent. Hotel soap and sex and something distinctly masculine, completely Ben. 

“Then I'll pay for the rest of today. And tomorrow, and the next day. I'll pay for all of your days. How does that sound?”

Rey was fine with being a courtesan. She didn't hate the work, and sometimes she actually enjoyed it. Like these last two days with Ben Solo. But right now, Ben was pleading with the courtesan only, the side of her that bartered for her body and her time. This man she could potentially care about wasn’t asking this of the girl within, who would want nothing more than to finally be loved by _somebody._ That alone made her hate her profession. She hated that she was a paid girl. She hated every credit that Ben Solo had given her. 

“I can't just stay in this hotel room and wait for you,” she said. “That's not how it works.” _Not for me._

“Well of course not,” he said gently. “I'll find you someplace nice to live in a better part of town. Somewhere with big windows, so you can enjoy the sunlight.”

Rey’s resolved faltered, if only a bit. He’d find her somewhere to live? Ben kept going. 

“I'll spoil you rotten, sweetheart. Clothes, jewels, whatever you want. All the seafood you can eat. So fresh it's still moving, since that seems to be what you like.”

Rey tried to pull away, but Ben wouldn’t let her go. 

“You don't have to stay cooped up,” he said. “I'll pay you well enough that you can travel wherever you want on-world, so long as I’m in your bed at night. And I’ll be good to you. I promise.”

The more he said, the more he offered, the more Rey felt like she was breaking. Like the corroded seams inside her were coming apart and she was collapsing into herself. A decrepit starship finally giving in to the desert wind. 

Rey had always known that life had a monetary value, the same as salvaged fuses or a fuck against a wall. She should be flattered that Ben thought her worth so much, and that he was willing to pay that bottom line. But she wasn't. Rey didn't understand until this moment that what she wanted was for him to keep her because he needed her. To offer her something—real. 

He didn't need her, though. He wanted her, and his heart pumped blue blood, built a life on buying what it wanted. 

She should say no, but Rey knew that she wouldn't. This wasn't much different than what she already knew; at least now she could be another thing paid for in a nice home with good food. 

“All right,” she said, her voice sounding hollow to her ears. 

Ben picked her up and spun her around in a circle, laughing. He was breathless when he set her back on her feet, and Rey couldn’t help but give him a smile. 

“You won’t regret this,” he said. “I’ll make every day a joy for you.”

Rey had the fleeting thought that he could make her happy on water and portions alone, but that was a stupid thing to say to a man who’d just purchased his new favorite toy.

“You should go to work,” she said, holding in a snort at how wifely she sounded just now. That wasn’t what she was, not even close. “I’ll—pack my things? I guess?”

“I don’t want to go,” Ben said. “But I’m supposed to cut a ribbon on a hospital in honor of my grandfather and deliver a very trite speech. In about three hours.”

Rey looked heavenward. “Oh, poor thing.”

“Yes, it’s a true tragedy.” 

He kissed her again, then once more.

“I’ll try to get your place set up within the next few days,” Ben said. “Give me your address so I can visit you in the meantime, all right?”

Rey threaded her fingers through his hair, stroking with all the tenderness her heart would allow when it had just been sold.

“All right,” she said. “I’ll wait for you.” 


	5. Chapter 5

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.

Ben had never been so exhausted as he was that morning, not during his first rigorous weeks of lightsaber training, or even after the sleepless seventy hours he spent drafting the military budget proposal last year. Tired beyond measure, but so satisfied that he barely cared.

It might take a little time for Rey to be as happy about their arrangement as he was; she wasn’t used to tenderness or luxury. Ben supposed that he would have to shower her in both until she took them for granted.

He found her a place on the outskirts of the city. The windows alone—two-and-a-half stories high—were probably twice the square footage of her former home. He’d come to see her like he promised, and had her in her narrow bed. After getting a good look at that ridiculously cheap shoebox apartment, he’d felt prompted to get her something grand. A house with vaulted ceilings, polished wood floors, sparkling white walls. Empty for now, except for Rey’s meager boxes of belongings and a bed.

He’d given her money to go shopping later today to furnish the house. Ben barely got a thing done all morning because he was excited to see how Rey had chosen to decorate her new home. What sort of things she might indulge in now that she was rich enough for money to be no object.

He was so distracted that Aila fetched him a cup of caf in the middle of the day without being prompted. It was as overt a reminder to get his shit together as she dared to express.

“Thanks,” he said, more grudging than not.

Ransolm Casterfo had endorsed Ben’s changes to the education bill, so things were moving along swiftly there. More pressing was the vote to create the position of First Senator. It was in nine days. Things were looking favorable, and there was at least one more Populist who might be swayed across the aisle.

Naturally, he’d been tasked with this job.

Ben called Aila back to his office and said, “Set up a lunch meeting with Senator Perris. Sometime this week, no later.”

“I’m on it,” she said.

It was as good as done, Ben knew. He’d have to give Aila a raise soon.

By the end of the day, he was so antsy that his hands were shaking, and he spent the whole drive to Rey’s house thinking of all the things he’d do to her once he got there. Tickle her, kiss her breathless, fuck her on the bed so thoroughly that she’d cry, then pamper her afterwards.

When he stepped inside, he found Rey’s house nearly as empty as it had been this morning. She’d clearly gone shopping, but all she’d managed to purchase were more plants than appropriate for any one person and a ridiculous number of rugs. Ben walked in on Rey tending to her plants, spilling water on a very fancy carpet.

“I like what you’ve done with the place.”

Rey set down her watering can and covered her face with her hands.

“I don’t know how to fill up this much space,” she said. “There’s too much. This is too much.”

“Come here,” Ben said, but he went to Rey, moved her hands away from her face, and dropped a quick kiss to her frown. “It’s all right. You can do this, but there’s no hurry. And I really do like the plants.”

Rey gave him a feeble smile. “Thanks, I do too.”

She twisted her arms around his neck, tousling his hair. “I missed you,” she said.

Ben hoped that was true. If she’d missed him already, then perhaps Rey was warming toward him.

But she wasn’t happy. He’d somehow made her sad with this spacious house, so much room to build a new life. It was far more than she’d ever had before, and maybe that was the problem. Too many things she wasn’t used to.

“I’m going to order in some Nabooian food,” Ben said. “It’s delicious, I swear. And, well, I’d like to share something of my home with you.”

Rey kissed him again, and harder, then dragged him down to the damp rug beneath their feet. After she was finished with him, they ate the decadent feast on the floor, half dressed and sprawled out like savages.

“I’ll have Aila scrounge up some stylists to help you out. Do all the shopping for you,” Ben said as he fed her a bite of honey-soaked cake. “It was careless of me to just throw this all at you at once.”

Rey licked her lips, stretching out on the coarse rug and smiling up at the domed ceiling.

“‘S okay.” she said. “There are worse problems a girl could have.”

Ben hummed in answer. Rey would know all about greater troubles, he supposed, growing up on Jakku. He’d never been himself, but anyone who knew anything about galactic geography had heard that Jakku was the most backwater planet in the Inner Rim, a barely populated wasteland of slaves and junk bosses. He wanted to ask Rey about her childhood there, but this was a soft moment at the end of a day that had been difficult for her, and he couldn’t risk ruining it.

“When’s your birthday?” he asked. “I don’t want to miss it.”

Rey shook her head. “I dunno. I just use the middle of the year.”

Ben closed his eyes. He didn’t want Rey to see pity there, although he’d rarely heard anything sadder. When he looked at her again, she’d turned her face away.

“I’m nineteen, by the best I can figure,” she added. “In case you were worried about that.”

Ben took a large bite of roasted winter plums and whitefowl to avoid answering. He’d been ignoring the reality of Rey’s age. She was eleven years younger than him, and he didn’t particularly want to think about that either.

Rey rolled onto her stomach and touched a finger to his nose. “When’s yours? I just got this great new job and I can afford to buy you something good.”

Ben laughed, only half amused. “Two weeks from tomorrow. I’ll be thirty.”

“Old man,” she teased. “Sure you can keep up with me?”

Ben pushed aside the last of their food, pulled her to him, and said, “That sounds like an invitation.”

Rey shrieked as he dragged her to the bedroom, slung over his shoulder.

Two days later, Ben met with Senator Perris at a large restaurant on Kellso Street. It was famous for serving every kind of wine in the galaxy. Exaggeration or not, the selection was excellent.

Setha Perris was a grey-haired, golden-skinned woman. Not quite human but not far from it either. She was famously hardheaded, like most people from Calenthi, and she’d been stubbornly straddling the line between Populist and Centrist for years.

Ben asked Perris about her wife and children, but she cut through his pleasantries with a sharp wave.

“We both know why we’re here,” she said. “You want to know how I’m voting.”

Ben shrugged, took a sip of his Alderaanian wine (still stunned that they had a bottle here), and said, “More or less. I’m also planning to sway you if you’re leaning against the proposition.”

Perris laughed. “Straightforward. I like that. But I’ve heard every argument there is, and as much as I appreciate the idea of centralized leadership, I’m not sure the galaxy is ready for it.”

“The Empire is over thirty years dead,” Ben said flatly. “We’re ready.”

Perris tapped the tabletop, squinting at him. “You only say that because you weren’t alive to witness the war. If you had been, you’d feel differently.”

Ben leaned closer. “Maybe so, but there are more present matters to consider. Smaller worlds are getting left behind while larger planets flourish. Slavery and poverty dominate half the galaxy. And the Senate is deadlocked on nearly everything; nothing is being done, and something has to change.”

“And those decisions should be left up to one person?” Perris asked. “That’s quite a gamble.”

Ben wanted to take a quick look into the senator’s mind, see where her weaknesses were, how she might be swayed. But he shouldn’t, and he didn’t.

“Think of Calenthi,” he said. “Your homeworld’s concerns are being pushed aside. Don’t you think the people who voted for you would be better served by stronger leadership?”

Perris gave him a long, worrying look.

“Are you trying to bribe me?” she asked.

“What? No.” Ben downed the rest of his wine in one go, which was practically a crime considering the vintage. “How could I? I can’t promise what a First Senator, if elected, would do. It could as easily be a Populist as a Centrist.”

“Probably will be a Populist if your mother runs,” Perris said.

Ben smiled, though he had to keep his teeth gritted to manage it.

Perris promised to think on his argument and kindly allowed him to pay for their lunch. He stayed at their table, and as soon as she was gone, he ordered something stronger than wine.

.

.

Even with the now fully furnished house and a closet full of pretty, though simple clothes, the money sitting in Rey’s personal account was uncalled for. Scrolling through the ledger on her holo, it was like Ben moved money when he got bored, deposits at all hours of the night and day.

She knew he was stressed at work, had an important vote coming up very soon, but she hardly thought funneling money to his mistress—who was decidedly _not_ spending it—was a good way to decompress.

Ben brought home three gifts that night: a box of Rey’s favorite orange chocolate truffles, a bouquet of scarlet lavablooms, and a broken down speeder.

Rey raised her eyebrows when she saw it. “You shouldn’t have.”

“It cost less than the flowers,” Ben admitted. “I think the old man who sold it to me just wanted to get rid of it.”

She kicked the side and a rusty panel fell off.

“Well I can see why.” Rey circled the speeder, taking stock of all its broken parts. A lot. “I can’t believe this thing still runs. It’s held together with spit and hope.”

Ben tugged on the end of her braid and said, “I thought you might like to fix it.”

“I gathered that.” Rey smiled up at him. Did he have any idea how valuable this piece of junk was to her? “Thank you. I’ve been getting restless, and there’s only so much money I can spend a day.”

Ben pulled her hand to his mouth and kissed her knuckles. “It’s not as if you’re trying very hard, sweetheart.”

The speeder kept her busy until Ben dragged her away for dinner. It was delightfully ancient, nearly every part needing replaced or repaired, and almost none of them would be available new. She’d have to visit a junkyard (or several!) and the idea excited Rey as much as a diamond necklace might excite another mistress.

That night in bed, when Rey reached beneath the waistband of Ben’s linen pajama pants, he stilled her hand. “All right if we just sleep tonight? I’m kind of exhausted.”

Rey chewed her lip, tired as well but anxious to show him just how pleased she was with her gifts. “If… if you’re sure?” This was what she was here for, to keep him happy in bed. If he began to tire of that, she might very well be the next thing he got bored with.

“Sadly yes.” He smoothed Rey's hair away from her forehead. “I promise to wear you out tomorrow.”

She couldn’t stop the eager nod at his words. So long as he kept wanting her. So long as he kept her. He turned to his side and Rey snuggled up close, spooning him and nuzzling the back of his neck.

“Thank you, Ben,” she whispered, her voice dreamy and soft. “I love—everything you got me.”

.

.

Ben couldn't sleep, no matter how tired he was. He couldn’t stop thinking about how little it took to please Rey. This poor, vulnerable woman-child he'd found at the bottom rung of the city. He kept her well fed on lies, and she ate up all of them.

He had to tell Rey the truth about her Force sensitivity, and soon, before she found out on her own and hated him. She'd leave him for sure then.

Fear spiked through him, so startling and hot that Ben turned over and rolled Rey onto her back.

“Wake up, sweetheart.”

Rey smiled up at him, sleepy and soft. “Ben…”

“I changed my mind,” he said, and started to pull up her nightdress. “Can I have you?”

Rey nodded, then grabbed his hair and guided him down, until he was between her legs.

He would keep her here, no matter what it took. If he had to spend every credit in his accounts, drag home a thousand junk speeders, get on his knees for her until she couldn't stand it once more, he would do it. He’d give her everything he had, if only she would stay.

He didn’t love her, but he wasn’t willing to part with her either. Rey was his, bought and paid for.

She tried to keep him in bed with her the next morning, but Ben had to leave. Work would be hellishly demanding until the vote, and he couldn’t afford any days off until the next recess.

“I’ll be back as soon as I can.” Ben kissed the fragile pulse at her wrist, slow and steady from sleep. “Miss me while I’m gone?”

Rey groaned, head thrown back against the pillows. “More than I should.”

That admission was almost enough to make him shirk his responsibilities. Almost.

Ben’s mother showed up at his office later that afternoon, sans her usual entourage of assistants. It was a rare thing for her to visit. Collaborating with the opposition was poor form, even if the opposition was her son. At least, that was the excuse.

Ben didn’t stand to greet her. “You can sit.”

Leia claimed the chair across from his desk, one eyebrow raised and mouth thin. Unimpressed or disappointed or both.

Ben set aside his datapad and asked, “What can I do for you?”

“This is a personal visit, not a professional one,” she said. “Your father’s coming into town in a few weeks, and I thought you might like to have dinner with us.”

“Send me the exact dates and I’ll check my calendar. Is that all?”

His mother rolled her eyes. “You’ll check your calendar? I know what that means, Ben.”

That he’d get back to her with an unfortunate schedule conflict and a promise of _maybe next time_.

“I’ll think on it,” Ben said, more honestly. “He’s been gone for months. Why don’t you just get a—”

He didn’t finish that question. Divorce was beyond his parents’ capabilities, no matter how much sense it made. They still wanted each other, even though they were as ill suited as any two people he’d ever met.

Ben had scorned his parents for their unwise relationship for most of his life, but lately he was starting to understand them better than he’d like to.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks so much for reading! We'd really appreciate it if you let us know what you thought of this chapter. :)


	6. Chapter 6

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.

The night before the vote for First Senator, Ben brought Rey a protocol droid that was more negative space than it was functioning machine. A puzzle Rey wasn’t sure even she could solve. He stayed to help her work on it, and though she suggested they go to bed several times, it wasn’t until early morning (after they were able to determine the patch needed for the droid’s broken language algorithm) that Ben let himself be dragged to bed. 

Rey kissed him until he dozed, then ran her fingers through his hair until she did as well.

He was gone when she woke in the morning. Her hand was outstretched onto his side of the bed, and Ben had placed a gleaming new wrench in her loosely gripped fist. Rey smiled, pulling the tool in to look it over. Ben didn’t leave her roses on her pillow, but rather brought her food, or potted things still growing, or a mechanical riddle to work out.

Rey snacked on raw noodles in front of the holoscreen as she watched the live feed of the Senate proceedings. She’d take one long pasta stick from the box, then crunch crunch crunch her way to the bottom.

Ben looked crisp and fresh—from the neck down. His hair was still mussed, and he looked so tired that Rey wished she’d convinced him to sleep earlier. But he was brilliant, presenting his case in the time allotted calmly but convincingly. She couldn’t see how anyone could vote against his reasoning. 

But just enough did. When the roll was called hours later, a slight majority forced the case for First Senator to die.

Ben came home so haggard looking that Rey was nervous to face him. She handed him a glass of wine as soon as he was through the door and hoped that would help soften his mood.

“Drink all of that,” she said, pulling him to his favorite chair.

Ben drank his wine too quickly, not meeting her gaze. She dropped to her knees and touched his thighs, running her hands soothingly up and down as she watched him, waited for him to say something.

He set aside his glass and unbuckled his belt.

.

.

After the day he’d had, Ben felt furious and unmoored. He needed to hold fast to something, to exercise control when he had none. And Rey was his perfect girl, quick to obey and happy to please him. 

She was so good at this. But then, she would be. Only the stars knew how many times she’d had her mouth on a man, a truth that was starting to bother him more than it should. It didn’t dirty her—Rey was too good for anything to manage that anyway—but it made him jealous that others had had her before him. 

Ben gripped her hair while she took him deep, watched her frown prettily in concentration as she worked him. Every touch was delicious and wet and expertly done. He groaned and let himself buck up into her mouth. She could take a little of that surely. 

He told her how he wanted it, and Rey listened to every direction like she’d made it her personal mission to get him off. When he came, he held her down and rocked into her, giving her plenty to swallow.

As soon as he let her go, Rey pulled back and wiped the wet from her mouth, sniffling and eyes teary. She kept her gaze fixed on the floor between his feet, as if something about this had shamed her. He couldn’t imagine what, since he’d already had her nearly every way there was.

Ben tucked himself away, fixed his clothes, and said, “Come here, sweetheart.”

Rey climbed onto his lap and rested her head against his shoulder. She was trembling so subtly that if he hadn’t been holding her in his arms he wouldn’t have even noticed it.

“What’s wrong?” he asked. “Did I hurt you?”

“No,” she said, though her voice was so small it was almost lost in the fabric of his shirt. “Of course not.”

Ben ran his fingers from the nape of her neck to the small of her back, once, twice, again, dragging out the gentlest touches until her shaking stopped. 

“Then what’s wrong?” 

Rey pulled away from him, a practiced smile on her face. She leaned in and kissed his cheek, as if purposefully avoiding his mouth. “Nothing, Ben. I’m just a little rusty. Let me go clean my teeth, then I’ll order us something in for dinner. My treat.”

She was lying, slipping back behind the shield of her professional facade. Ben supposed that was fair, since he’d rarely treated her more like a courtesan than he had tonight.

After Rey disappeared to the fresher, he put his head in his hands. There was nothing wrong with using his mistress like a paid girl. That was what she was, what their agreement called for. But whether it was right or not, he felt as if he’d stepped wrong and crushed a flower underfoot, something delicate that was just beginning to bloom. 

.

.

Rey brushed away Ben’s taste until she gagged. She spat and wiped her mouth, glancing up at herself in the mirror. Her eyes were tear-filled and her lips swollen. She wasn’t sure how much of this was due to Ben’s enthusiastic use of her and how much was simply humiliation. She washed her face, blew her nose, brushed her hair so hard her scalp stung.

She thought of her holopad in the living room, of all the articles she’d researched, the opinion pieces and polls. Rey had to have a dictionary open in another tab to translate half of it, and she scribbled notes to help to organize the whole senatorial process into a compact concept she could understand. But she’d spent the better part of her day preparing herself to talk about Ben’s work when he got home, win or lose.

He’d not said a single thing until after he’d gotten some. 

Ben knocked on the door, then said, “Rey. Can I come in?”

She ran her fingers through her hair, dabbed under her eyes with a tissue, and put on her brightest voice. “Sure.”

Ben looked almost sheepish when he walked up behind her and wrapped his arms around her middle. It wasn’t an expression she was used to seeing on this confident man, and it gave her hope that he felt at least a bit guilty for treating her like a whore. 

Rey was tall, but being held by Ben always made her feel little. Easy to protect, or easy to hurt, depending on his mood.

“You were so good for me,” he said, pressing his lips to her temple. She closed her eyes, breathed his words in. Ben wanted her, and that was surely enough. 

.

.

Ben hadn’t laid hands on Rey in four days. He couldn’t stop thinking about what had happened after the vote, how he’d used her. And how it had obviously hurt her feelings. That was unexpected from a courtesan, especially one like Rey, who had undoubtedly seen the worst that the underground had to offer.

She was starting to care for him too much, and Ben saw it plainly. It was impossible to miss when she looked at him with such tenderness.

He didn’t know what to do about it. Letting her go and giving her the truth about her Force sensitivity would be the kindest route, and the most honest. But he was a selfish creature, and he wasn’t ready to part with her yet.

Six days after his failure at the vote, Rey turned to him in the night.

“Please,” she said. “Touch me.”

Ben worked her up with his mouth, then took her gently. Rocked into her body like the fragile, precious thing she was, deserving of delicate handling. Rey looked up at him as if he was the sun in her sky, sighing as he brought her to the edge. She was halfway to crying by the time he made her come, and he didn’t stop there.

She was such a good girl, and all his. It didn’t matter how many men had had her before. When Rey was on her back beneath him, saying his name, he might as well be the only one. 

“I love this,” she whimpered. “I love—”

“Don’t say it,” Ben gasped; he was so close. “Just feel this, sweetheart.”

Rey sobbed, a pretty but wounded sound, and Ben felt a surge of shame along with his release. Rey didn’t come again.

After, they lay beside each other, the only sound in the dark room their labored breathing. Rey wasn’t crying anymore, and for that small mercy Ben was grateful. The silence stretched and Ben reached out his hand to brush hers.

“I’m sorry—”

She took her hand away. “There’s nothing to be sorry for, Senator. I’m still learning what it is you like in bed, is all.”

Rey turned away, giving him her narrow back, beautiful even in the dark. Her Force was cold and stringent at the back of his tongue. He could tell her now, tell her that he could feel her hurt as clearly as if she’d written it on his skin.

But he stayed silent, let her find sleep if she could.

This was better. Ben had a fondness for Rey, a tenderness, but he couldn’t allow himself to love her. Nothing good ever came of that.

.

.

Ben was straightening his collar when Rey walked into the sunny breakfast room the next morning. His hair was wet, combed back from his face, so she was able to see the faint blush that stained the tips of his ears when he caught sight of her.

“Not—getting dressed today?”

Rey brushed past him, taking a barabel fruit from the bowl on the sideboard. She took a bite before answering, blood-red juice dribbling down her chin and dripping onto her bare chest. She shrugged.

“Maybe once you leave. I like to keep myself available in case the mood strikes you.” She licked her lips, but didn’t clean off the rest.

He frowned, but his gaze flickered over her body just the same. Naturally. If she could depend on anything about Ben Solo, it was that he always wanted her. The shine would wear off eventually, of course; stars knew he’d already taken every part of her that he could fuck. But until then she’d do what she could to keep him satisfied.

“I don’t really have time right now,” Ben said, his voice crisp, distant. “Tonight.”

Rey hopped up onto the table and let her legs part, enough that he could see her bare sex plainly. First thing this morning she’d scrubbed herself furiously, shaved everything from her underarms to her ankles, and rubbed a sweet lotion all over her body afterward.

That telling blush reddened his cheeks. He was interested—now, not tonight—which satisfied Rey almost as much as it hurt her. 

She smiled and said, “Good. You should get your money’s worth.”

Ben tugged at his collar, ruining his efforts to straighten it. “I have to go. I’ll see you later.”

As soon as the door closed behind him, Rey climbed off the table, went to the bathroom to clean the juice off her chest, and pulled on her most covering robe. She threw her hair up into a messy bun and grabbed one of the expensive bottles of wine Ben had brought her off the shelf. Rey didn’t bother with a glass, just sipping the rich emerald wine straight from the bottle.

It was too early in the morning to drink, but that only meant that she’d have plenty of time to sober up before the Senator returned. There was a dull ache in her chest, but Rey refused to let it hurt any more than it already did. These pretty white walls were too pristine to fill with tally marks, and the ceilings far too high. She could count a dozen lifetimes on the walls Ben had given her.

Rey finished half the bottle, then pulled out her holopad. She swiped past all the tabs still open with Senate information and commentary on why the proposal hadn’t passed. She instead brought up her inbox, opening message after message: hot spring baths for two, dancing lessons, night cruises of Meraki’s lagoons, twinkling a thousand colors with bioluminescent algae. A whole miniature vacation she’d planned for Ben’s birthday, paid for with most of the money he kept pouring into her account. 

She cancelled each reservation, one by one, not caring that she’d lose her deposits on nearly all of them.

It didn’t matter. There was always more money to be had when Ben Solo was your keeper. She’d just buy an expensive set of lingerie to wear for his birthday instead.

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please take a moment to let us know your thoughts. We always love hearing from you. :) <3


	7. Chapter 7

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Ben came home on his thirtieth birthday to find Rey already in bed, wearing nothing but ivory silk. It made her look innocent, like a girl on her wedding night, and he wondered if that was why she’d chosen it: to give the illusion that she’d only ever been his.

He had her on her hands and knees, slow and deep, drawing it out until they were both half broken from it. Virginal lingerie or not, Rey always took what he gave her and came when he told her to.

She didn’t say anything afterward, and Ben hated it. He should be relieved that things between them had returned to a more professional place, business as usual, but he enjoyed talking to Rey. She was clever, funny, sweet. And she’d hardly spoken a word to him in the last three days, unless it was an invitation to fuck her.

Ben pulled Rey close and kissed her. She allowed it for all of a minute, then wiggled out of his grasp.

“I need a bath. Want to come with me?” she asked, her voice lofty, teasing, a put-on flirtation.

“Not right now. The education bill is going up for a vote next month, and it needs some fine tuning. Ransolm is doing a lot of the heavy lifting, but…”

Rey was looking somewhere over his shoulder, nodding along.

Ben made himself smile. “Sorry, didn’t mean to bore you. Go take your bath, sweetheart.”

Rey was more than intelligent enough to follow a discussion on education reform, but if she wanted to play dumb to get away from him, Ben wasn’t going to stop her.

She stayed in the fresher for a long while, playing music loudly enough that he couldn’t hear her splashing in the tub. It gave him time to look over Ransolm’s edits and incorporate a few of his own. He shouldn’t technically be working on this outside of his office, even if he was using his most secure datapad, but Ben didn’t have the energy to give a damn.

When Rey finally returned, she smelled like cherry blossoms and clean girl, so tempting that Ben set aside his work and pulled her onto his lap. She’d dried her hair straight, and it fell in a sleek curtain to the middle of her back. He ran his fingers through it, admiring this one small facet of her beauty.

“Can I ask you something? It might help me with my work.”

Rey frowned, but she said, “Sure. Go ahead.”

Ben rested his hands on her hips and asked, “What kind of education did you get on Jakku?”

Rey wrinkled her nose at him, the prettiest of scowls. “Are you making fun of me?”

Ben straightened, pulling her closer. “No! Of course not.” Rey was smart, too smart for the good of anyone. “You’re so brilliant with numbers and engineering that I was just curious—”

“I taught myself,” she said. “There is school on Jakku, but it’s taught in hot tents by nearly illiterate junkwives. I learned my numbers and how to read ship models, but that was about it.”

Ben blinked. He knew it was bad, but stars. “Can you write?”

Rey looked away. “A little. My name, numbers, stuff like that.”

Ben caught her chin in a gentle grasp and guided her to look at him again.

“That’s criminal,” he said. “As intelligent as you are, you deserve the best education the galaxy has to offer. And if you ever want it, I’ll pay for it.”

“What do I need an education for when I make my living on my back?” Rey ran her nails down his chest and asked, “You want me to write you poetry now?”

Ben hissed at the sting of fresh scratches on his skin. “Of course not.”

“I didn’t think so.” Rey wrapped her legs around his waist and whispered, “There’s only one thing you want from me. Isn’t that right, Senator?”

Ben didn’t answer. He wasn’t quite sure what the truth would be anymore, and he couldn’t bear to feed her any more lies.

This wasn’t the Rey he knew, so determined to make herself a thing for his use, and he had to do something to bring back the girl who’d opened her heart to him. It was greedy, to want what he couldn’t give in return, but he’d never claimed to be better than he was.

.

.

Ben came home the next day with a gift. Rey’s smile was genuine as she plucked at the ribbon. She liked it when he picked out presents himself instead of dumping more credits into her bank account. The cream colored box was heavy, sturdy. Holding an obviously expensive gift.

Lingerie, perhaps, or jewelry.

She pulled off the lid to find—a dress. A gorgeous dress made of sheer, sage-colored silk voile. She lifted it from the box, her mouth agape. It was a wispy thing, skirts and sleeves fluttering, with delicate, pale pink flower appliques trailing over the bodice and falls of fabric. It was like holding a spring breeze in her hands, petals dancing and leaves of grass swaying.

“Ben,” she gasped, her eyes suddenly full of tears. “Ben, I—”

When she looked up, his face was soft, kind. A calm sort of happiness settling in the corners of his lips and eyes. “Do you like it?”

“Yes,” she said immediately. “Gods, yes. It’s the most beautiful—it’s like a garden I could wear.”

His smile broadened. “I saw it in a window and I couldn’t think of anyone else but you.”

Rey blinked, dashing tears down her cheeks. She didn’t have anywhere to wear it, but she didn’t care. She would dance around her home in it, barefoot and loose haired like a pagan goddess.

“Thank you,” she said, her voice small.

“You’re welcome. Go put it on.”

Her heart lurched. “Now?”

He reached out, trailing his fingers over her throat, her collarbone. “Yes, now. We’ll be late for our dinner reservations otherwise.”

“Dinner?” She sounded like an idiot, piping his own words back to him. But not one thing he’d said or done since coming home was what she expected. “As in, at a restaurant.”

Ben nodded. “I got us a back room at Phandiir. Best seafood you’ll ever have.”

Rey expected to part ways and meet up again at the restaurant. She and Ben had never traveled anywhere together since reporters sometimes followed him, and it would be a disaster if they were caught together. But today Ben had hired a private driver—in a speeder with tinted windows—to ferry them to Phandiir.

Once they were safely ensconced in the back seat, Rey kissed Ben’s neck and whispered, “How many credits did you pay him to keep this quiet?”

Ben’s voice was low and amused when he said, “None. I mind-tricked him. He won’t remember a bit of this tomorrow.”

Rey giggled, although she probably shouldn’t find some poor driver’s amnesia funny. It didn’t seem right to use the Force in such a manipulative way—but she could hardly scold Ben when his misbehavior benefited them so beautifully.

They kissed and shared sweet touches all the way to the restaurant. She felt like a proper teenager, making out with her boyfriend in the back of a speeder. It was mostly innocent in a way that she’d never had the opportunity to indulge in when she was younger. By the time she was fifteen she’d been earning her portions by opening her legs and there hadn’t been any time for chaste kisses.

Rey pulled away and brought shaking fingers to her lips, feeling the heat and wet left over from Ben’s kisses. She didn’t want to think about Jakku, not tonight, when this cold man was finally warming to her.

Phandiir was a small establishment of polished purple metal, glass, and blue marble. Half the walls were tanks that held all manner of sea creatures. There was a graceful fish the size of Ben with iridescent scales and shocking green eyes that Rey hoped wasn’t on the menu. Something that lovely shouldn’t be eaten.

Ben chose the wine, then encouraged Rey to pick whatever appetizers her heart desired. She felt a bit bad about ordering three dishes, but then Ben added a fourth and it eased her guilt about being such a glutton.

“Everything here is so beautiful,” Rey whispered; this felt like the sort of place where one’s voice should be kept down.

Ben’s smile was gentle. “I’m glad you approve.”

“So what’s this all about?” Rey asked. “Did something good happen at work?”

He rolled his eyes. “Hardly. The Senate is as useless as ever. If the education bill doesn’t go through, I may not even run again.”

Rey tried to ignore the hope that flared to life in her chest. If Ben wasn’t a Senator, that could change everything. He wouldn’t have to hide her if the world wasn’t watching him.

But that wasn’t the real problem, and Rey knew it.

“I’m sorry,” she said. “I didn’t realize it was that bad.”

Ben waved his hand, dismissing the matter. “Never mind that. I want to have a good night with you. So no more work talk.”

“Fine by me.” Rey saluted him with her glass, and Ben clinked his against hers. The rose tinted crystal rang in the quiet room, mixing just right with the soft stringed music she couldn't find the source of.

“You're beautiful,” he said, and Rey smiled into her glass. Something was different about Ben tonight, and she very much enjoyed it.

“I've been well kept,” she said. “A life of leisure suits me.”

Ben laughed softly. “You were beautiful before I ever came into your life, Rey.”

Rey knew she was pretty—courtesans had to be if they wanted to make any kind of money—and Ben’s attraction to her was hardly a secret. But there was something sweeter about the way he called her beautiful tonight. It felt like he said it without an agenda, like he wanted to compliment her simply because it was true, not because he wanted under her skirt.

Rey could feel a blush staining her cheeks. Which was ridiculous.

“I’d tell you how handsome you are,” she said, “but I think your ego is big enough as it is.”

Ben leveled a look at her, all mock seriousness. “Watch it, sweetheart.”

Dinner was perfect. Rey ordered more off the menu than was decent, she and Ben each drank a bottle of some Nabooian red, and they flirted all night. It felt almost like a date.

They held hands on the ride back home, warm skin to warm skin. Rey watched the city flash by, the streaks of lights dimmed by the shaded windows. So many colors, blurrier through the lens of too much wine.

“Tell me something,” Rey said. “The night we met. Why’d you want to talk to me?”

Ben squeezed her hand hard, too hard. He didn’t say anything, so Rey offered her own answer.

“You wanted me, but you were afraid to do anything about it. At least at first. Right?”

Ben looked away from her, staring out his window. “I wanted you the moment I saw you.”

Rey felt warm, adrift, but the way he was speaking—he sounded almost sad.

She moved across the seat, pressing herself to his back, kissing his shoulder.

“It's ridiculous, but it was like I felt you walk into the room that night. I felt you and I wanted nothing more than for you to come over to me, talk to me. And then you did. And I—” She smiled against the smooth fabric of his suit. “I felt lucky for the first time in my life.”

.

.

He had to tell her. There wasn’t a choice any longer, not when Rey was ignorantly treading all over the truth.

“It wasn’t luck,” Ben said. “It was the Force.”

Rey giggled and asked, “What, like fate? The Maker decided I was destined to be your mistress?”

“No, that’s not what I…”

He hadn’t been a politician so long that he couldn’t remember what honesty looked like. All he had to do was open his mouth and speak, but Ben’s throat felt closed off, choked, as if he was caught in some invisible enemy’s grip. Silenced into more lies.

“Then what do you mean?” Rey asked.

He turned to her, kissed her forehead, and said, “I think I might’ve had too much to drink, because I can’t remember.”

Ben didn’t know why, but he couldn’t let Rey go. He just couldn’t. It wasn’t a matter of eventually, or someday, or when he was done with her. He understood now that he was never going to tell Rey the truth, not when it meant losing her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks so much for reading. We’d love it if you let us know your thoughts, so please take a moment to leave a comment below. :)


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please take extra care regarding the warnings, as this chapter contains descriptions of past rape/non-con.

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Rey kicked off her shoes as soon as they were through the door, twirling in the blue-white moonlight streaming through the long windows.

“I love this dress,” she said, for probably the fifth time that night. “It makes me feel… wild. Earthy.” She came up to Ben, kissing over his smile. “Wanna go make love in a meadow?”

Ben laughed and kissed her harder. “Later, maybe. I’m too sauced for sex right now.”

Rey couldn’t help giggling. “Yeah, me too. Wine was good, though.”

Ben hummed in agreement as he bent to kiss her again. His mouth was soft and warm, insistent without being rough.

“Time to take the dress off, sweetheart,” he murmured against her lips.

Rey nipped him. “I thought you said you were too drunk?”

Ben stooped and lifted her easily into his arms, carrying her like a bride to her marriage bed. She wrapped her arms around his neck, kicking her feet and laughing.

“I am,” he said. “Far too drunk. Doesn’t mean I don’t want to get you naked and into bed.”

Once they were under the covers, they kissed with no purpose to it except for the pleasure it brought. She could taste Ben through the red of their wine, something simply, perfectly _him_.

“I adore you,” he said, his lips still resting against her own.

That was almost right, nearly what she needed to hear. Only one word off, its meaning a close cousin to the love she was so hungry for.

It was enough to make her smile, however. To make her tug his hair till he kissed her again.

“You’re different tonight,” she whispered. It wasn’t smart to draw attention to it, this affectionate warmth he’d radiated all evening. He might stop, might draw back. But Rey was curious, ravenous, needy.

“I’ve missed you,” Ben said. “I know I hurt you, and that’s not what I wanted. I just…”

Rey drew away from him and rolled onto her back, eyes closed. “Please, can we not do this right now?”

Ben moved closer and slid his arm around her waist. “Okay, sweetheart.”

Rey breathed in the word, then exhaled it into the dark. She loved when he called her that, like she really was his sweetheart. Not a courtesan he found in the gutter, not a girl playing dress-up while she ate the galaxy’s finest seafood with the incorrect fork. It was such a pretty pretend.

“Tell me about your childhood, Rey,” he murmured. “If you want. I just—you’re the most incredible woman I’ve ever met, and I want to understand where that came from.”

Rey lay still and quiet next to him, barely daring to breathe. “You don’t want that story, Ben. I’m not a good person in it.”

Ben nuzzled her neck with his nose. The air around them was warm and wine-scented.

“Politician, Rey. It’s been years since I’ve met a good person.”

That drew out a smile, and Rey sifted her fingers through his hair.

“The first thing I remember is my parents leaving. I don’t remember their faces or their names, I just knew that they’d gone and promised to come back for me.”

Ben held her close, like he could protect her from a tragic past. He couldn’t, and being abandoned hadn’t been the worst thing to happen to her.

“I was under a junkboss, Unkar Plutt, for a long time. His was a debt I could never seem to catch up on, no matter how much scrap I brought him. I had to eat too, so whatever was left seemed to only pay the interest.”

“How old were you?” he asked, soft, as if trying not to startle her.

“Six, when I started. I was fifteen the first time someone offered me credits for the use of my body.”

Ben stiffened, held her closer. “Rey,” he said, but nothing else. What else was there?

“He was a merchant, on world for a few days. Offered to show me his ship and I said yes. I’d never seen something up close that hadn’t crash landed thirty years before. He got me into his bunk, but I fought him off pretty easily. When you learn how to fight on Jakku, you learn how to kill.”

Rey paused, taking a breath. She remembered that day. The first time she’d felt climate control, the first console she’d seen that wasn’t smashed to bits or scavenged bare or both. Teff’s lips had been too wet on hers, too warm. His tongue heavy and full in her mouth.

“He offered me credits instead. Actual credits to fuck me.”

Rations and water were the only currency she’d known to that point, and the idea of money, real money, had been too precious to ignore.

She didn’t want to tell him the rest. How much it had hurt, being torn apart and discarded. How ashamed she’d been, during and after, with no one to blame besides herself.

But it hadn’t stopped her from selling her body again. As the desert’s salvage dried up, her choices had narrowed, and she’d gotten on her back—or her belly, or her knees—for traveling strangers until she had the funds to leave Jakku.

“I’m sorry, I don’t think I can—” Rey hid against his chest. It was easier to be weak when Ben was here to take care of her. “I can’t talk about this anymore.”

“That’s okay,” he said. “You’re safe now, all right? I won’t let anyone hurt you like that ever again.”

Rey decided to believe him, even though she knew she shouldn’t. This would end someday; Ben’s body wouldn’t always be in the bed next to her, keeping her safe and warm. But tonight he was here, tonight he’d been perfect, so his promise was true. If only for a little while.

.

.

Rey fell asleep just as the sky was starting to lighten. They’d stayed up far too late, talking about everything, and now the sun was coming up, stealing away the intimacy of the night.

Ben watched her sleep, this beautiful girl, so fragile and strong at once.

She’d been raped. It shouldn’t have surprised him, considering the line of work she’d been in at nineteen, but he hadn’t wanted to think of it. He still didn’t. Now, though, he had no choice but to face a hard truth: that Rey had been used and exploited since she was a child, and he was responsible for piling more pain on top of what she’d already suffered.

Things had to change. Not because he pitied her—it was impossible to pity Rey when she was so fierce and independent—but because he couldn’t bear for things to continue as they’d been lately. Rey, so guarded and impersonal, if passionate. Last night she’d acted like her old self, like a girl who trusted and loved him, and he didn’t want to lose that again.

“I’m going to treat you so well that you’ll never want to leave,” Ben whispered, too quietly to wake her.

He started with food. When Rey woke up in the late morning, he had her sideboard loaded with a breakfast buffet representing half the galaxy—at least what was available in Hosnian Prime and for delivery.

She came in wearing a decidedly un-sexy robe and her hair was a tangled mess. She’d never been more beautiful.

Rey eyed the food then turned to him. “If this is because of last night—”

Ben shook his head. “It’s because I wanted to. Ransolm still hasn’t gotten back to me with his revisions, so I thought I’d take the day.”

She cocked her head. “Can you do that?”

“Well, I’m going to, so we’ll find out.” Days off were certainly not unheard of, but not necessarily with the drafting of such an important bill on the line. “Sit. Eat. We’ve got a speeder arriving for us in an hour.”

“Where are we going?” she asked as she loaded her plate. Too much food to ever be considered polite, and Ben absolutely loved it.

“To my personal hangar. Thought you might like to try your hand at piloting a ship.”

“I've always wanted to fly!”

Rey squealed, threw her arms around his neck, and peppered his chin and jaw with kisses.

Ben laughed, smacked her on the bottom, and said, “Breakfast first. Then we can fly all day if that's what you want.”

That was exactly what they ended up doing, and Rey loved every minute of being in the air. She whooped as she took the ship through barrel rolls, then laughed when Ben showed her how to pull out of a dive at the last moment. It would have been dangerous for any other new pilot to try such a thing, but Rey had the Force on her side.

She was incandescent when she flew, so happy and enthused to learn. He'd buy her a ship next. Something small but speedy. Nothing with a hyperdrive.

“You’re a natural,” Ben said. “I’m starting to think you could do anything.”

She rolled her eyes. “Oh, yes, that’s me: Rey from Nowhere, polymath.”

“Don’t make me extol your virtues. I’ll do it, sweetheart, in embarrassingly extensive detail.”

Rey looked away, but she was smiling. “That won’t be necessary.”

On the way home, Ben received an urgent message from his mother, demanding that he meet her in her office.

“She’s infuriating,” he said. “Trying to order me around like a child.”

Rey poked his shoulder. “Well you are _her_ child.”

“She threw me away when I was nine,” Ben said. “Sent me off to my uncle for Jedi training. He threw me back when I failed, but that doesn’t mean she gets to act like a parent now.”

“Ben.” She laid her hand on his arm. “She didn't throw you away.” She indicated toward his holopad. “That's not what disinterest looks like.”

Ben sighed. “Of course. I'm sorry, that was insensitive of me.”

Rey squeezed his arm, leaned to kiss him high on the cheek. “You don't have to go politician on me, Ben. You don't have to pretend anything with me, ever.”

Ben closed his eyes and breathed deep, trying to take comfort in this almost truth. She was wrong, of course. She just didn’t know he’d been pretending from the moment they met.

“I don’t want to go talk to her. I’ve had the most amazing day with you, and I’m sure whatever she has to say will spoil that.”

Rey smiled, brushing his hair away from his face and running her fingers over the curve of one of his ridiculous ears. “That’s the great thing about me,” she said. “I’ll always be available for another amazing day.”

Something about that stung in his chest, like this bargain they’d set was making her less than what she could be. Which was true. Rey was brilliant at everything she attempted, but for some reason, she seemed content to live in the pretty box he’d bought her. For now at least.

“You should go,” Rey said. “Ignoring her will only make it worse.”

Ben sighed. “You’re right.” He turned his head and kissed her palm. “I’ll come back home to you as soon as I’m able.”

Ben knew something was wrong long before he saw his mother, because he could feel her nervousness through the Force, sharp and frantic, from the moment he stepped into the wing that housed her office.

By the time he reached Leia, her anxiety had infected him too, and the first thing Ben said was, “What happened?”

She took a datapad from inside her desk, swiped through some business or another, and handed it to him.

There were pictures of him with Rey, from their date at Phandiir last night. Ben had secured a private room for them, of course, and had taken every precaution in getting there quietly, but someone (probably a staff member at the restaurant) had caught them anyway.

“How did you meet her?” Leia asked.

Ben gave the datapad back to his mother, trying very hard to seem unbothered. “Does it matter?”

His mother gave him a hard look, the kind that said, _I know I didn’t raise an idiot._

“I’m not sure what you’re so worried about. All I did was have dinner with a beautiful woman.”

“She’s what, twenty?” his mother asked, her voice low and accusatory.

Ben laughed so roughly that it almost choked him. “I know that _you,_ wife of a smuggler ten years your senior, aren’t about to criticize me for taking a younger woman on a date.”

Leia winced, then leaned back against her desk. “Of course not, but… the person who brought these to me ran a scan on her image. They found that she was arrested a few months ago for—well, for soliciting sex unregistered.”

_Shit._

Ben swallowed. “Mom—”

She held up her hand. “Let me finish. I don’t judge a disadvantaged girl for trying to make her way however she can, but you are my son, and I don’t want you taken in by someone who could be using you.”

Ben’s worry snapped into fury so quickly that he shouted, “I know she’s using me! She’s my mistress.”

His mother gaped for a few seconds, but Leia Organa was nothing if not a consummate politician. She regained her composure before Ben could fully grasp what he’d just admitted to.

“You knew,” Leia said. “You… hired her.”

He couldn’t answer without humiliating himself further, so he said nothing.

“Ben. Why would you do something so foolish?”

“I’m not talking to you about foolish relationships,” he hissed. “Rey is a good person, and I’m better off with a woman like her, courtesan or not, than you are with a man who won’t even stay on-world.”

He expected his mother to lose her temper at that, but she only smiled, her presence in the Force suddenly calm, serene, all of her earlier anxiety absent.

“You really care for her, don’t you?”

Ben backed away, shaking his head. “That’s none of your business.”

“Yes, then.”

“ _Mom_.”

Leia waved her hand dismissively. “Bring her to dinner. Paid company or not, she’s important to you. I want to meet her.”

“This is absurd,” he said. “I’m not introducing you to my mistress.”

She stood straighter, drawing herself up in a way that gave her more authority than her height should allow.

“That wasn’t a request, Ben Solo.”

He took a deep breath and reminded himself of what Rey had said earlier: _That's not what disinterest looks like._ His mother cared, even if she had no idea of what to do with him.

More importantly, he wanted Rey to know that she mattered to him, that he wasn’t ashamed of her.

So he said, “I’ll bring her to dinner, on the condition that you treat her like a visiting queen.”

“Of course.” His mother smiled. “Your father gets here the day after tomorrow, and you did say you’d make time for that.”

“No, I said I’d check my calendar, but that’s fine I suppose.”

She looked surprised but pleased, and Ben pressed his advantage.

“Rey is Force sensitive, which I’m sure you’ll notice right away. It’s a painful subject, so don’t say anything about it when you meet her.”

Leia frowned, the warmth of the Force around her cooling to something curious, almost suspicious.

“All right,” she said, after a long moment. “I won’t say a word.”

Ben knew he had nothing to worry about. His mother was good at keeping secrets when it served her.

After all, watching her work was how he’d learned to lie.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading. We'd really appreciate it if you let us know your thoughts in a comment below. :)


	9. Chapter 9

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.

“Maybe I should just go with the white,” Rey said as she tugged at the bodice of her ruby colored dress. “This one makes me look like a working girl.”

Ben came up behind her, kissing the back of her neck as he fastened a necklace into place. It glittered with purple and crimson iridescent stones she didn’t know the name of. “It does not,” he said gently. “You look elegant in red.”

Rey touched the jewels at her neck, warm already from her flushed skin. Heavy, expensive. A statement, but of what, she didn’t know.

Ben bit at her shoulder, far too lightly to bruise, but it staggered her breath nonetheless. Then he stood straight and brushed his fingers over the place he’d bitten, as if he’d left a mark in a way that couldn’t be seen. He had, Rey supposed, ever since the night they’d met.

“Let’s go,” Ben said. “I don’t want to be late.”

Rey fiddled with the weighty necklace the entire drive. She didn’t really know why she was coming to his dinner with his parents. A courtesan at the table with a princess.

“They aren’t going to like me. I’m too young, too—”

“Shhh,” Ben said, oddly calm next to her. “Trust me, you’ll be the favorite person in that room.”

Rey knew she must look a nervous wreck when Leia Organa—Alderaan royalty, war hero, and senator—opened the door and invited her inside her apartment.

She’d seen pictures of the senator, of course, but Ben’s mother was much smaller in person than Rey had expected. Her hair was in a braid that fell to her waist, brown streaked with grey, and the lines beside her eyes crinkled when she smiled. Princess Leia was even more regal and beautiful in person, and Rey found herself stuttering out something about how nice this apartment was.

“It gets the job done,” she said. “Come on in. I have wine, golden grapes, and the best cheese in the city.”

Rey followed Princess Leia inside. “Thank you. It’s an honor just to be here—um, should I call you Senator? Or do you prefer—”

Leia laughed, a surprisingly brash sound from such a dignified woman.

“Please, Leia is fine. And you’re Rey, yes?”

Rey felt her face flush. She hadn’t even introduced herself. Gods, she must look ridiculous, starstruck and slow.

Ben wrapped his arm around her waist. His light touch grounded her, and Rey breathed a bit easier.

“Can I get some of that wine?” Ben asked. “I had a long day.”

Leia led them to her sitting room, poured glasses for all of them, and waved at her couch. Rey sat next to Ben, putting more space between them than she’d prefer. She didn’t want to look clingy, or worse, lewd.

“I heard there were meetings over the education bill all day,” Leia said. “Going well?”

Ben smirked. “I’m not talking to the opposition about that.”

Leia shrugged and said, “I had to try.”

Rey took too large a gulp of her wine and coughed. It was strong and thick, flavored of honey and citrus. Leia’s gaze was gentle on her, however.

“I should have said something. That wine is practically a spirit for how strong it is. It’s a favorite of Ben’s father.”

Rey nodded. “Han Solo,” she said. Which was simple and stupid. Leia knew the name of her husband.

“Who is late, as per usual,” Ben muttered into his own wine glass.

“Give him some grace,” Leia said. “He’s coming all the way from the Caprica System.”

Ben snorted. “You’re not helping your argument.”

Rey drank while Ben bickered with his mother. It was still a little much for her, but she didn’t want to look like she couldn’t handle a strong wine.

“So, Rey. Where are you from?” Leia asked.

Her voice was kind and curious, not accusatory. So much friendlier than she had any reason to be, and that made it easier for Rey to answer.

“Jakku,” she said. “I lived there all my life, until—until a couple of years ago.”

Until she prostituted herself all the way to Hosnian Prime.

Rey felt like Leia could read that on her face, but she only smiled and said, “Well I’m glad you’re here. Ben’s never brought anyone home before, and—”

“Have you heard from Dad yet?” Ben asked, cutting right through a revelation that Rey very much wanted to hear the rest of.

She set her glass aside, for fear of spilling wine all over the carpeted floor. (It was probably self-cleaning in an apartment this fine, but still.)

Ben had never introduced any of his former lovers to his parents, and she didn’t know what to make of that. She was his paid companion, not a girlfriend, not even a fling. The lowest class of bed-warmer one could purchase, and he’d seen fit to bring her to dinner with his parents.

Rey knew that he cared for more than the pleasure he could find between her sheets. The last few days had proven that much, at least.

It was foolish to think that Ben might be coming to love her, but she found herself hoping anyway.

.

.

Ben should not find a nervous Rey so precious, but he did. She made her life on being comfortable with new people, but here, with his mother, she was a little bit of a mess. It made him want to kiss her then carry her off over his shoulder.

He ran his hand over the length of her arm. She shivered, darting her gaze to his and pursing her lips. He could feel the surge of heat through her Force energy: embarrassment, but affection too. Want.

She had no idea how beautiful she was. Even when he had his eyes closed, he could feel the subtle ripple of her Force, welcoming, soft edges and biting angles by turns. He enjoyed all of it, every shift in her mood. It wound through his own energy like green vines through crumbling rocks, breaking him apart and holding him together.

Then he felt a change in that energy, an intrusion of light as familiar as his own name. It shone like a beacon through the tumult of the Force all around them, distant but growing closer. Bright and warm, a sun that drew lesser bodies into orbit around it.

Luke was here. Close, and getting closer by the second.

Ben looked to his mother, whose own presence in the Force had flared into vivid, gleaming life as her twin approached.

“Luke,” she breathed, and then she was running to let him inside.

This wasn’t how this night was supposed to go. He couldn’t face Luke, not after the shame of his rejection, the fear he’d instilled in his own uncle through the simple act of being himself. He’d never fully shaken the darkness that had so frightened his family, and worse, Rey was here.

Rey, whose energy could hardly be contained, so powerful even as it slept within her. Luke would see it right away. He’d see it, and he’d say something, and everything would be ruined. Rey would leave, or his uncle would take her away, and—

“Ben, are you all right?”

Rey was looking at him, worry drawing her lovely face into a frown.

“I’m fine,” he said, “but we need to go. Now.”

“What? Why? We haven’t—”

Ben pulled Rey to her feet. “My uncle. Luke. He’s here and I am not—we’re leaving.”

Rey nodded, following him to the door, though he could taste her confusion and apprehension at the back of his tongue, bright and stringent like the citrus wine they’d been drinking.

Too strong. She was too strong in the Force, too noticeable to be ignored by anyone, least of all his uncle. When she was frightened like this, it was hard to breathe through her simmering power.

He had to get her out of here.

But then the front door opened. There was a moment of false hope, when only Han Solo strode through the doorway. Maybe Ben was wrong, maybe he’d just been too wound up—

Then Luke was there, four steps behind. Smaller in stature than Han but a thousand times more potent.

Luke smiled at him, a wary thing with regret behind it, but Ben didn’t have time to think on that. He pushed past his uncle, clinging to Rey’s hand so hard that it had to hurt.

“Ben!” Han called. “Where are you going?”

Ben didn’t answer, only hurried to the turbolift at the end of the hall, but it was on the bottom floor, a good fifty stories down, and he could feel Luke approaching.

“You brought me a student just to run off with her?” he asked.

It was meant to be something like a joke, Ben knew, but if he’d had his lightsaber he might have struck Luke down for it.

Rey tugged in his grip but he didn’t let her hand go. He wouldn’t.

“What is he talking about, Ben?”

It felt like the walls were closing in, like the floor was cracking beneath his feet. He urged the lift to come faster, get him out of here with Rey still by his side.

Rey turned to Luke when he didn’t answer. “Sorry, I’m just Ben’s… companion. I’m not—”

“Oh, Ben. She doesn’t know. You haven’t… she doesn’t know.”

“I don’t know what?” Rey asked, her voice climbing, higher and sharper.

Ben stood between her and Luke, blocking her view of this stranger who’d taken so much from him.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered. “Just—come home with me, sweetheart, and I’ll explain everything.”

Rey shook her head, her hazel eyes overbright. “No. I want to hear this. Right now, from you or from him, I don’t care.”

Ben tried to tell her, but perhaps he’d simply lied too many times, because the truth caught in his throat, refusing to come out.

Luke stepped around him, looking right at Rey when he said, “You’re Force sensitive. I could feel your energy from the moment I stepped into the building.”

Rey blinked, the pulse around her stalling, quivering for just a moment. “What—What does he mean, Ben? What does that mean?”

Ben’s vision blurred with tears. This was ending. In a moment, it would all be over, and he would be alone again.

“You have the Force, sweetheart,” he said. His voice was quiet, but it rang in this ridiculous marble hallway. “Same as me and as Luke and my mother. It’s… beautiful.”

.

.

Ben had known from the moment they met that she was different, that she was like him, powerful in a way most people could never dream of. He could have treated her like she was special, a rare equal, and instead he’d chosen to make her his whore.

That was all Rey could think about on the long ride home. Ben kept trying to reach for her hand, to murmur apologies and explanations, but she couldn’t stand to suffer his touch or his weak excuses.

He sent their mind-tricked driver off with a huge tip, probably guilt driven, once they got home.

Rey hurried inside, suddenly desperate to get out of her clothes: a dress that cost more than a year’s rent in her old underground flat, shoes she could barely walk in, and a necklace fit for royalty. It was ridiculous, trying to make a silk purse out of a sow’s ear. Ben had the decency not to follow her to their bedroom, giving her the privacy to change into her most modest nightgown. Which was still revealing, because of course it was.

A knock came at the door, tentative and quiet.

Rey wasn’t ready to face him, but she said, “Come in,” anyway.

Even given just a few minutes alone, he looked like hell. His eyes were red and wet, his hair mussed from tugging at it. He looked shriveled, less-than. Good. Rey had never felt smaller than she did just now.

“You lied to me,” she said. “You’ve been lying since the beginning.”

Ben nodded, looking so miserable. “I know. I can explain.”

Some cruel sound barked out of her, not enough humor to be a laugh. “Can you? It must be good.”

Ben looked down, gaze fixed on the hardwood floor.

“I was afraid that if you knew what you were, you’d want to be a Jedi. That you’d leave,” he said. “And I know that was wrong, I do, but—Rey, please try to understand. I didn’t want to lose you.”

She backed away, arms crossed over her chest. Why had she put on a nightgown when she had a closet full of real clothes? Now she was trapped in a bedroom with Ben, wearing next to nothing.

“You’re a coward,” she said. “A selfish coward.”

Ben scrubbed his hands over his face, wiping away tears. That shouldn’t tear at her like it did, ripping open some raw, sympathetic place in her chest. Not after all he’d done.

“Sweetheart, just give me another chance, and I’ll make it up to you. I swear it.”

“Make up for which part?” she hissed. “Lying? Using me when you _knew_ I loved you? Or keeping me locked in this pretty little cage?”

“All of it, every single thing I did to hurt you. Just stay with me, Rey.” Ben rushed over and grabbed her by her shoulders. His lips quivered and his voice was a wavering whisper when he said, “Please.”

He’d never been more beautiful than he was in this moment, broken before her. And gods help her, she was so tempted to stay.

But she couldn’t, not if she wanted to respect herself ever again.

“No,” Rey said. “I can’t.”

His grip on her tightened, and she could feel his hurt twisting into anger, thickening the air in the room.

“Are you going to my uncle’s Jedi temple?”

“To train at the path you couldn’t follow?” Rey asked. “Maybe.”

She should tell him to let go, but his bruising grasp kept her here, bound to a moment that threatened to drown her and drag her under.

Ben shook his head. “You’d hate it, having to bury your passions. Giving everything you are to the Force, until there’s nothing left for yourself.”

“It’s none of your concern,” Rey said.

“It is my concern! Because I...”

Ben’s mouth trembled again, and the look in his eyes, wet with yearning—Rey knew what he was going to say before he said it.

“I love you.”

Rey beat at his chest. Two hours ago, she’d have given the breath in her lungs just to hear those words, but now it didn’t matter.

“You don’t even know how to love. You’d rather pay for a fuck than give any of yourself to another person, because you’re afraid,” she said. “You’re the most fearful person I’ve ever met, Ben Solo.”

The heat in the room spiked, a surge of his energy in the Force. Maybe she could only sense it because of what she was.

“Do you feel better now?” he asked. He held her tight to his chest, his words hissing from him. “Throwing my love in my face, even though you’ve been starving for it?”

Ben picked her up and slung her over his shoulder like a bag of salvage. Rey could’ve fought his rough handling, but she didn’t. She knew he was taking her to bed, and she didn’t want to stop him.

This wouldn’t change anything. She was still leaving, and they both knew it, but when Ben laid her on her back, Rey pulled up her nightgown.

She could be his, just one more time, before she belonged to herself again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks so much for reading. We’d love it if you let us know your thoughts, so please take a moment to leave a comment below. :)


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1000 kudos! Thank you so much, from both of us! We are just thrilled that you've enjoyed reading this half as much as we've enjoyed writing it.
> 
> I know there were some questions at the end of the last chapter; we hope this chapter answers them. -RTC

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Ben didn’t bother with foreplay, but Rey still moaned when he pushed into her. It only took a few thrusts for her body to open to him better, wet and needy, and within a minute she was whining his name. Just _Ben,_ over and over, like the entirety of her world had narrowed to him.

He wanted to make her forget, for however long this lasted, that he was a liar and a user who had mistreated her from the start.

“I love you,” he said.

Rey closed her eyes. “Don’t—”

Ben kissed her, then whispered the truth against her lips, borne on a ragged breath: “I love you, sweetheart, and I’ll say it however much I like.”

Rey ran her nails down his back, scoring his skin, punishment inflicted for love found too late. He hissed and took her harder, faster. She’d walk out of their home tonight still feeling him between her legs. She’d leave with his come inside her and his marks on her skin, because she was his and he was hers, whether they were together or not.

Ben didn’t know he was crying until Rey reached up and cupped his cheek. Then he felt the slick presence of tears, tasted the grief on his lips. He kissed her, making her taste it too.

She twisted from beneath his mouth when her release hit, whimpering like he was hurting her. He was, he knew, but not with his body.

Ben tried to hold back, to make this last forever, but the sweet clutch of her sex made it impossible. He all but sobbed as he let go, pressing as deep as he could.

Rey’s face was still turned away, silent tears spiking her lashes, running her pretty makeup down her cheeks and onto the pillow. She was so beautiful and so broken. He kissed her temple, the wet, fragile skin beneath her eye.

“Get off of me,” she said, her voice a shaking whisper.

“Stay. Please, please stay, sweetheart. I’ll make this right. I’ll teach you anything you want to know—”

“You will get off of me and let me leave,” she said, her voice deeper, more affecting. The Force—his incredible girl was calling on the Force. As if she only needed to know its name to recognize it in herself and use it. 

“Rey—”

She looked him in the eye. He could feel her gathering the Force within her, so powerful even in such crude, untrained attempts. It was an unforgivable choice he’d made, keeping this thing she so naturally manipulated from her. He felt her energy pressing against him. “You will get off of me and you will let me leave!”

Ben did as he was told. Not because she’d made him—though he was sure she could inflict some serious damage if given a few more minutes. He gave her space and sat aside, breathing hard, because he’d hindered her enough. The least he owed her was this, the freedom to leave, after all he’d done. Even if it was tearing him apart.

Rey went to the fresher, and he could hear water running. Washing the traces of their lovemaking from her skin, probably.

He dressed while she was gone, then leaned against the wall. Waiting, watching, as everything fell apart around him.

When Rey came back, she set about packing a suitcase, stuffing a fortune of fine clothes into it like they were rags. Ben couldn’t say anything, only watched in silence as she roughly handled so many of his gifts, desperate to get out of here, to get away from him. She stopped only to pull on a dress—forest green, simple, one of her favorites—and grab her toiletries from the fresher.

Then she was zipping up her suitcase, stepping into a pair of flats, slinging her purse over her shoulder. Gone, she was almost gone, and Ben ached to stop her, no matter what it took. But even if he did, he still couldn’t keep her. He’d ruined any chance of that.

“Rey…” 

Ben didn’t know what else to say. Apologies and confessions hadn’t mattered to her, and he had nothing else left to give.

Finally, he thought to ask, “Are you coming back for the rest of your things?”

She shook her head. “No. You bought it all anyway. Sell it, or give it away, I don’t care.”

“If you change your mind—”

“Don’t do that, Ben. Please, just don’t.”

It was sad, he knew. Pathetic. He didn’t want that to be the last that Rey saw of him, a cowed man begging for her to come back.

“I’m sorry,” he said again. He’d offered so many apologies tonight that they were numbing on his tongue. “I am, sweetheart. Truly.”

Rey watched him, her eyes dry, her back straight. She breathed deep, and when she exhaled, he caught a trace of her scent: expensive clover perfume, hand milled soap, and Rey.

“ _Truly_ means nothing, coming from you.” She picked up her suitcase. “You should know that by now.”

She walked past him, steady and sure, her head held high. It was how she’d walked into his life, and it was how she was walking out of it.

.

.

Rey kept her composure through the walk down the hall, in the lift ride, even through the minutes waiting for the speeder she’d called. It wasn’t until she was ensconced in the back, on her way to a modest hotel on the other side of the city that she finally broke.

She sobbed into her hands, ugly and loud. The driver cleared her throat, asked her if she was all right, but Rey just waved her hand and the driver didn’t speak again.

How often had she seen Ben do such things? Orchestrate his comfort and success through a simple wave or a few short words. He’d never tried it on her, and now she knew why.

The Force. All along, she'd had it too. Gods, that was likely why he'd approached her in the first place. Because he could sense her. She couldn't imagine not being able to sense him, not now. All she had needed was a few simple words, and it was like the other half of her unlocked. 

Rey had been like this her entire life, she knew that now. She didn't feel different, she just—knew. It was so simple, and Ben had kept it from her. 

Ben, the liar. The thief, taking things that should never have been his in the first place. Her love, her freedom, her full understanding. Her own thoughts? Had he read her mind, seen what would woo her and courted her accordingly? All these things, she would have given him for free. No credits, no jewels. Just Ben. Just someone to finally, finally love her.

He did love her, or so he said. But Rey wasn’t sure he even knew what love was. He turned away the love offered by his family, by her. He’d only given Rey his when he was afraid of losing her.

His pretty possession, kept clueless in her box.

The speeder arrived at the hotel, and Rey tipped the driver well as she exited. It probably wasn’t wise, not now that her income was stalled, but she felt guilty for using her powers over a person who was only trying to see that she was all right.

Rey bought a week outright, no tricks, and took her own things to her rented room. She’d lived just fine on her own for all of her life. She could continue to do so, and better. She knew something of being a lady now, had pretty clothes that could pad her nightly price. She could register, even, become a courtesan of stature and worth. 

The thought made her sick.

Rey didn’t want to sell herself anymore. She didn’t want to belong to anyone ever again. She didn’t—

There was a knock at her door.

 _Ben_?

He wouldn’t follow her here, he wouldn’t dare.

No, this wasn't Ben. This energy was brighter—how had she not felt him walk into the building, like he had her? She felt like an absolute idiot. Rey stalked to the door, yanking it open.

“Luke Skywalker.”

His smile was kind, if tight. “Just ‘Luke’ is fine.”

Rey stepped back, giving him room to come inside.

He had to be here to recruit her, to take her to his Jedi temple on some unknown world. It sounded wrong, ridiculous even, that a living legend like _Luke Skywalker_ would be interested in a courtesan for a student. But he’d told her the truth about herself, and he was here. There was nothing else he could want.

Rey sat on the edge of the bed, and Luke pulled a chair over so that he could sit facing her.

“I’m sorry about Ben,” he said. “He was always—”

Rey shook her head. “We’re not talking about him.”

Not now, when his betrayal was so fresh, and she could still feel the ache of him between her legs. Maybe not ever, because Rey couldn’t imagine a time when this would hurt any less.

Luke’s eyes drifted to her suitcase against the wall. 

“You’ve left him, then?”

Rey felt the temperature shift in the room, agitated warmth suffusing her. Had she done that? 

“Yes,” she said simply. “But if you bring him up again I’ll kick you out of here.”

Luke raised his eyebrows, and Rey almost took that back. This man had saved the galaxy more than once, and she was nobody, a girl with no right to speak to him disrespectfully.

She didn’t apologize, though. Jedi Master or not, her private life was none of his business.

Luke only nodded, then said, “You know why I’m here.”

Rey looked down at her hands, twisting in the fabric of her skirt. “I think so, yes.”

“I believe you belong at my temple. Your connection to the Force is… strong, but I can teach you how to control it,” Luke said. “This is your choice, though. I’ll be on-world for three days, if you want some time to think about it.”

It would be so easy to say yes. _Of course I’ll come with you, Master Skywalker. Take me far away from here and make me into someone who matters._

Then Rey thought of Ben, too driven by passion—and perhaps darkness—to follow the Jedi way. She would do better than him, probably, but there was no way to know for certain unless she tried.

She didn’t want to, though.

A few months ago it would have been a dream come true to discover that she had Force powers. She’d heard the legends of Luke Skywalker and admired them, imagined living one herself someday. The Jedi life was a noble one, if austere, and it was a path for heroes. Even a courtesan could hunger for nobility; even a courtesan could want to be a hero.

But that was all before Ben. She’d given so much of herself to him—which was more her fault than his—and now she had to pick up the pieces that remained. Gather them up and create something new, maybe, since the old Rey was gone. Rey Nobody, a sad little girl from a sad little world, who sold herself from a sandy hammock to a senator’s bed.

Good riddance.

“I don’t need time,” Rey said. “I already know that I can’t come with you. And no, it’s not because I’m going back to Ben.”

“Can I ask why, if it’s not that?”

“I need to find my own path,” she said. “If I followed yours right now, it wouldn’t be for the right reasons.”

Luke nodded. “Well, if you change your mind, you know where Leia is, and she knows where I am. The door is always open for you, Rey.”

Maybe she’d want what Luke offered eventually, but not today. 

.

.

Ben sat on the edge of the bed, staring at his hands. He’d had them on Rey not an hour ago, and now she was gone, slipped out of his grasp like sand through his fingers. The evening had dashed past him in a flash; it didn't seem right that his life could change so completely in such little time. 

Love. He’d said that he loved her, and it was true. At least, Ben thought it was. He’d never felt like this before, like he couldn’t breathe without Rey. Her presence was a balm to every open wound he had, and he wanted to give her the same comfort she’d given him.

He hadn’t, though. He’d only hurt her. 

They shouldn’t have made love. It had been sad, broken by anger and fear, and that wasn’t what Ben wanted for their last time.

He crawled under the covers and buried his face in Rey’s pillow, breathing deep. Her scent clung there, but it wouldn’t for long, and he didn’t want to miss a moment of it.

He woke up too late the next morning, but he climbed out of bed, showered, dressed in fresh clothes, and went to work. The education bill was up for a vote in a week, and he had meetings left and right until then.

Ben did his best to pay attention, but his thoughts kept wandering toward Rey. Would she return to the courtesan’s life? She could use the fine clothes he’d bought her and the money in her account to up her prices. Or would she find some other work? He could imagine her tending the hanging gardens at the city center, watering her green charges into flowering.

“Ben, are you listening?”

Ransolm was frowning at him, tapping his datapad.

“Sorry,” Ben said. “What was that?”

Ransolm rolled his eyes. “I said that we need to add a more emotional angle, something that will sway the most soft-hearted Populists. When you get down to it, they’re a sentimental bunch.”

Ben snorted. “Tell that to my mother.”

Ransolm flashed a smile, then said, “We need an example. A sad story, something tragic, because this _is_ tragic. There are too many children in the galaxy who don’t even learn their numbers.”

Ben thought of Rey, a small child alone in a starship graveyard, forced to scavenge for her daily bread, then pushed onto her back to escape.

“I can do it,” he said. “I… knew someone from Jakku, a slave. If her story doesn’t move you, then you don’t have a heart, soft or not. But I need to keep her anonymous; I don’t want reporters knocking on her door.”

Ransolm nodded. “Give me the details after we adjourn.”

Ben spent the better part of the afternoon with Ransolm, working through the best way to share Rey’s story in a way that wouldn’t exploit her. He didn’t want to use her ever again, but he thought she’d approve of this, a way to keep other little girls from suffering like she had.

It didn’t ease the ache of missing her, wanting her, but it was a step toward doing something right.


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hate that we had such a long hiatus, friends, but we're back! All the kudos and comments have been so encouraging, and every one is appreciated. We hope you enjoy this new chapter.

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Ben didn’t deliver the speech himself, but Rey knew that this was her story being broadcast to the whole galaxy. A girl sold to a Jakku junk boss, barely educated but a brilliant engineer, forced to turn to the courtesan’s life for pitiful portions.

Senator Casterfo said, “That girl is not alone. There are so many like her on each of our worlds, large and small. Even our thriving community here on Hosnian Prime has dark corners where children grow hungry, left in ignorance with very little chance to better their circumstances. A standardized education system with two free meals a day could make the difference for so many.”

Rey got herself a glass of red wine, then poured it down the bathroom sink. She didn’t know how she felt about this, Ben using her story to promote a political platform. She was certain that the intention behind it was noble, but she’d had no idea this was coming.

Not that she would have let him through her door to ask permission.

She watched Senator Garr of the Populists speak about the dangers of identical education across all worlds, which each have their own unique cultures and perspectives that shouldn’t be stamped out. He called upon the people to remember the Empire’s system, which indoctrinated millions, a danger that must not be forgotten.

It was a good speech, Rey had to admit, and she sat on the edge of her seat when the votes came in, eyes closed and breath short until the results were announced.

When the bill was approved, she put her head in her hands and sobbed.

Then she knew exactly how she felt about Ben using her story: thankful that he’d turned a piece of her suffering into something that might change their whole galaxy. She’d made a difference, even if no one would ever know her name.

Some part of her wanted to go to him just to say thank you, but she couldn’t. She’d left for good reason. He’d lied to her from the day they met, and it wouldn’t benefit her to see him again.

This was what she told herself when she emptied half her bank account a week later, buying a house outright. It looked somewhat like the one Ben had gotten her—high ceilings, tall windows, shining hardwood floors—but only because both suited her tastes so well. She was moving on, making her own space.

She had a life to live, one without Ben Solo in it.

Two days later, Rey decided that she wanted to find a job. She didn’t need to anytime soon, not with the obscene amount of credits still at her disposal, but she was ready. Ready enough at least. She didn’t know what she was going to do yet, but she finally had the means to make her own way. The rest she could figure out.

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Ben wondered whether Rey had watched the speeches before the vote. He hoped that, if she had, she didn’t mind Ransolm telling her story, but he had no way to know for certain. It wasn’t as if he could ask her.

He threw himself into work over the next few weeks, which made a decent distraction. Still, in quiet moments he thought of Rey. She had plenty of money to take care of herself now, and that gave him some relief. He knew she hadn’t left the city, because when he reached out, he could feel the sweet light of her presence in the Force. Distant but strong, more powerful than ever, as if the knowledge of her abilities had fully awakened them.

Ben could hardly focus on anything else over dinner with his mother, and Leia picked up on it immediately.

“Have you seen her?” she asked.

Ben glanced around the restaurant, then looked back to his mother. Her keen brown eyes missed nothing, and it was as endearing as it was annoying. He’d rather she paid attention than not.

“No. I don’t think she’d appreciate that.”

She nodded slowly. “Maybe not, but you won’t know if you don’t try. I’ve been furious with your father more times than I can count, but we always work it out in the end.”

Ben picked at his steak. He couldn’t even remember what kind of meat it was, because he’d been thinking of nothing but Rey when he’d ordered.

“This is different, and Rey isn’t you.”

Leia sighed. “I saw the way she looked at you, Ben. That girl loves you.”

“ _Loved_ ,” he corrected. “I don’t want to talk about this anymore.”

His mother let the matter rest, but once he got home, alone in his empty apartment, her words wouldn’t leave him alone, circling around and around like a carousel that never stopped.

_That girl loves you._

If he’d done things differently, she’d still love him, but he’d lied and used her. She had no reason to ever trust or want him again.

Two months after she had left him, Ben woke from a dream about Rey. He dreamt of her every night he managed to get any rest, but this one was different. He usually found aching passion followed aching tears when he visited her in sleep. Taking her in their bed until they were weak, confessing his love again and again until he had no voice to speak, then having to sit still as she walked out the door all over again.

In this dream, there had been no bed. She wasn't the Rey he knew, but a little girl playing in the sand, using a stick as a sword against a weathered boulder. She laughed, shrill and high, perfect rows of baby teeth flashing in her smile.

He knew this was a stolen moment, as fleeting in her life as it was in his dream. Rey the child had rarely smiled, he thought. Even in this, she was playing alone, nothing but a rock for company.

When he woke, he was crying, straining for that moment of innocent bliss, but the details were dissolving faster than he could reach for them.

She was a perfect child. Regret seared him as he suddenly longed for a baby that Rey could give them, just as perfect, just as Light, had he only been honest with her.

A decision slowly moved over him, and he got out of bed. Ben took a wooden box from the back of his closet and opened it. His lightsaber sat inside, wrapped in cotton cloth. He hadn’t opened this box since he was a teenager, hadn’t held his saber since he’d been expelled from the Jedi life.

Ben closed the box and drove across the city, following the light of Rey’s Force signature, pulsing with every heartbeat. It wasn’t a long trip by speeder, but it felt like a thousand miles, as if the distance between them had reached out into the world itself.

Rey opened the door before he’d even knocked. She would have felt him in the Force as easily as he’d sensed her, he supposed.

She looked beautiful in a flowing off-white dress, silk wraps wound around her arms. New clothes, not anything he’d bought her. Her hair was shorter too, falling just below her shoulders. Even her frown was pretty, though her gaze was hard on him, wary as a wild creature’s. At least she’d opened the door.

“Hi,” he said.

Rey glanced down, her jaw working, then looked back up at him. “What are you doing here?”

He tried to stand straighter, but shame was washing over him, stifling his pride. “I have something for you—”

“I don’t want a gift from you,” she said. “You can’t buy me anymore. Go home, Ben.”

He held out the box to her. “That’s not what this is about. Just take it, please?”

Rey snatched the box out his hands, opened it, and uncovered the lightsaber inside. She wrapped her elegant hand around the too-large hilt and pulled it free, holding it perfectly. Inexperienced or not, she had the instincts of a Jedi.

“This is yours,” she said, not a question.

“It was, but I don’t need it anymore.” Ben shrugged. “Whether or not you ever decide to train with Luke, you should have a lightsaber.”

She turned it on, and it _wump_ ed to life in the space between them. Ben felt no fear, however. If she used that blade to cleave him in half, he'd take it. He definitely deserved it.

But all she said was, “It's beautiful.”

_She_ was beautiful. Radiant, the lightsaber’s blade casting blue light over her, highlighting every curve and line of her body. Rey was made for this, and he’d withheld the truth of her light from her.

It was the worst thing he’d ever done.

.

.

Ben looked tired, ragged, his hair messier than she’d ever seen it, his beautiful brown eyes shadowed. Rey knew she should only be angry at him, but her fury had cooled over the last two months. Seeing him like this, so worn down and broken, only stoked something soft inside her.

She extinguished the saber, returned it to its box, and said, “You can come in if you want to.”

Ben canted his head, frowning, like she’d placed a particularly difficult puzzle before him and he had no idea how to solve it.

“Thank you,” he said, so gently that she nearly shivered, because that was the voice he’d reserved for her in vulnerable moments after they’d made love.

Rey led him inside and asked, “Do you want something to drink? I’ve got wine, juice, sparkling water—”

“I’m fine.”

Ben was taking in her house, and he likely noticed how similar it looked to the place he’d bought for her, that sunny cage she’d so happily locked herself into. She hoped he wouldn’t say anything about it.

He didn’t, only asked, “How have you been?”

_Lost. Free. Missing you._

“Great,” Rey said. “I’ve got a job as a mechanic at Grizzo’s Speeder Shop, and I really like it. It keeps me busy, and I’ve made a few friends there.”

Well, one friend. Rose. But it sounded better to make herself out to be a social butterfly, so Ben would think she was just fine without him.

Which she was.

He smiled, and there was real warmth to it. “I’m glad. You deserve to be happy.”

“I do.”

Rey poured herself a glass of white apple juice. She’d rather it was wine, but she refused to let Ben think his presence drove her to drinking.

“What about you?” she asked. “How are you doing?”

Ben fell quiet, chewing the inside of his cheek in a way that showed, then said, “Pretty awful to be honest. I’m tired of all the political machinations at the Senate, and…”

“And what?” Rey asked.

He looked down, his hair falling across his forehead. “And I miss you.”

Rey set her glass down on the kitchen counter. They hadn’t even made it to the sitting room before he’d said something dreadfully romantic. And tempting. She’d had no idea how empty she’d felt without him until this moment. For that reason alone, she should kick him out right now.

“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said that. I’m not trying to get you to come back to me.” He smiled weakly. “I know nothing could convince you to do that anyway, but I don’t want to lie to you ever again, and that’s the truth. That I miss you.”

She could have him back in an instant, if she wanted. Back in her bed, back in her life, only this time he’d love her. But what kind of love could they have without trust?

“I miss you too,” Rey said, because she’d always been stupid, always bent her rules where Ben Solo was concerned.

His eyes widened, beautiful and eager. “You do?”

“Of course I do,” she snapped. “I love—loved you, but that doesn’t mean we’re good for each other.”

“You’re good for me,” he said quickly. “I feel like I was asleep before I met you. Moving through the motions without any purpose, and you woke me up.”

Rey snorted. “And fucking me helped you find your purpose?”

“No, loving you did,” he said, his voice sharp, angry.

And there was the Ben she knew, the man she’d ached for and hated and missed over the last two months. Hot-tempered, passionate, stubborn, and bold.

“What do you want from me?” Rey asked. “You took so much already, and I don’t know that I have anything left to give.”

Ben’s anger seemed to leave him as quickly as it had come. “I don’t want anything from you. I’d like to _give_ this time, not take. Be a friend, if that’s something you might want.”

It was difficult to see Ben that way. He’d been her benefactor and her lover, their business and sex entangled, but not her friend. Their affair had been one of passion, nothing gentle enough about it to foster friendship.

Rey broke out the peach liquor that she’d saved for a difficult night, appearances be damned, and took it to the sitting room. She poured two tumblers and handed one to Ben. He winced at the taste, likely too sweet for him, but it was just right for her. Almost cloying, and strong enough that she nearly coughed.

“Are you any better as a friend than you are as a lover?” Rey asked.

He downed half his liquor in one go. Sweet or not, it seemed he needed a drink.

“I don’t know,” Ben said. “I don’t have any friends.”

Rey had to laugh. “And you want to start with me? That doesn’t really seem wise.”

“I don’t care about wise. I care about having you in my life, in whatever manner you’ll allow.”

She sat down, cradling her glass close to her chest to keep from dropping it. Her hands were trembling so much that Ben had to notice. His energy in the Force burned bright and hopeful, as light as she’d ever felt from him. Waiting, wanting.

“We can’t be friends,” Rey said. “There’s just too much between us, and besides, you’re famous, a senator. I can’t hide for you anymore. We’d both be dragged into the spotlight if we’re seen together by the wrong person.” She took an unsteady drink, saving the burning peach taste. “I’m sorry, Ben. I am.”

That light of his weakened, fading as his wishes crumbled into the shadows, and it nearly made Rey sob, the loss of his warmth around her.

Ben wiped at his eyes, and that was almost enough to make her relent and let public opinion go to hell. Almost, but not quite.

“I understand,” he said. “I’ll leave you be then.”

That was what she’d asked for, but as soon as the door closed behind Ben, snapping shut with sharp finality, Rey only felt alone.


End file.
